The Sweetest Victory
by mischief maker 2.0
Summary: Sakura bets her teammates can't best her in genjutsu, and naturally, things get out of hand. slight NaruSakuSasu
1. I Know What You Did Last Night

**Warnings:** Crack, vulgar language, underage drinking, misuse of genjutsu, het, yaoi, geriatric perviness, not for the weak stomached or faint of heart, don't read while eating XD, spoilers if you're not past the time skip in the manga, possible OOC, but it's not like this is meant to be taken too seriously anyway. :P

**Pairings**: NaruSasu, NaruSaku, SasuSaku, and a hint of KakaSaku

**A/N:** This does NOT fit in with the little team 7 thing I've been working on. It was one of those damn ideas that just wouldn't leave me alone until I did something with it. It was going to be a one-shot, but I've decided to break it up into probably 4 chapters. Oh and it takes place post-3 year gap under the premise that Sasuke returns and is allowed to rejoin Team 7. I'm saying it here since it may or may not get mentioned in the actual story. :3

**Disclaimer:** Nope, don't own it, and after reading this, I'm sure everyone'll be pleased by that fact.

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 1: I Know What You Did Last Night**

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Waking up in a strange place was nothing new to Sakura. In fact, it happened quite often. As nins, going on missions meant not always sleeping in your own bed. A lot of times you were lucky to get a bed at all! It was more akin to pull up a tree and _attempt _to sleep.

Then there was always the possibility of waking up in a hospital, which each of the members of team seven had done on at least one occasion. It was just a part of shinobi life. Things were unpredictable at best.

What Sakura did _not_ expect was to wake up in the cruddy, little apartment of Hatake Kakashi.

She blinked, willing her eyes to focus, as she stared up at an unfamiliar ceiling. 'Where the hell am I?' She scanned the items along the wall, searching for something, anything that would clue her in. There! On the desk was a picture of a much younger Kakashi with the 4th Hokage and two other people whom she presumed were his former teammates.

'….Okay, I'm at Kakashi-sensei's place, but why?' She winced as the pounding in her head grew worse the more she tried to think. 'Am I injured?' she wondered, feeling her head for bandages and sensitive spots and growing even more confused when she didn't find any.

'What happened last night? I remember hanging out with Sasuke-kun and Naruto. We were at Naruto's apartment. …..He had sake.' Her thoughtful expression fell as she rubbed her temples in a vain attempt to relieve the pressure. 'Head wanting to split apart explained.'

She had some difficulty remembering much beyond that. There had been some god-awful karaoke courtesy of Naruto and herself. Sasuke, naturally, had been too cool to participate in such silliness.

At some point she'd punched the crap out of Naruto for suggesting they all play strip poker. 'Pervert.' The thought almost made her laugh. What had happened after that was anyone's guess.

'That still doesn't explain why I'm _here_.'

A snore erupted next to her, causing her body to tense and her eyes widen in horror. In her quick search of the room, she never once checked to see if anyone was with her.

'Holy fucking shit!' Inner Sakura screamed in outrage. 'I got drunk and fooled around, and I can't even remember it!' The more logical side of Sakura's brain felt like crying. 'I was at Naruto's, and now I'm here. What exactly did I _do_ last night?' Then an even scarier thought entered her head. 'And with whom? What if that's not Kakashi next to me?'

Sakura swallowed audibly, steeling herself against the trepidation, and chanced a glance at the person next to her. She never thought she'd be so relieved to see her sensei's naked torso. It wasn't nearly as disturbing as she thought it would be, she realized as she took in the sight of well-defined muscles littered with the battle scars all ninja wore. The view definitely could've been worse, Inner Sakura enthusiastically agreed.

His face was still wearing the mask, much to her annoyance, but she was thankful for the sheet covering his lower body. She had no idea if he was wearing anything else or not, and she sure as hell wasn't brave enough to peek. Not at the moment anyway.

'At least _he_ won't go blabbing it to everyone.' That thought was probably the _only_ one that gave her any comfort in the situation. This was still their team leader after all. He was fourteen years older than her. She had never done anything like this, and she _still_ couldn't remember even running into him the night before.

Glancing down at herself, she noted with relief that she was at least partially clothed. Her top was on but completely open, and her undergarments were still in place. It was then that a few disjointed memories began to filter into her consciousness. She remembered touching herself… in front of Kakashi. Her eyes widened as her face immediately turned crimson. She couldn't remember if he'd touched her or not, but she had touched him, hadn't she? Oh shit. She'd… she'd…

She groaned, and her fingers unconsciously went to her lips as she remembered what exactly they'd been wrapped around sometime during the evening's events.

'Now's not the time to freak out,' she assured herself. 'I have plenty of time for that once I get out of here without waking up Sensei.' Before she could leave, though, she really needed to know one thing. Carefully, she lifted the sheet as she peered down the body of the man next to her.

Yep, naked.

'This is bad.'

Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and once again tried to get control of her nerves as her hand slid down between her own legs. Surely if something had happened… well, beyond what she already knew…. she'd remember _something_, wouldn't she? Her panties were moist, but nothing felt sore. 'I would be sore, wouldn't I?' Hell, she didn't know. All this thinking was making her head spin.

'Okay, I really need to get out of here,' she reminded herself. Silently sliding out of bed, she began looking for the rest of her clothes. Her shorts were lying on the floor near her feet, but she couldn't find her skirt anywhere.

'Where the fuck is it?' Inner Sakura growled.

Her eyes darted around the room desperately until they spotted it hanging from the corner of a picture on the wall. She sighed and shook her head as she decided she didn't really want to know how it had come to rest there. She made her way across the room and had just grasped the garment when a familiar voice behind her shattered any hopes of making a clean getaway.

"Sakura, come back to bed. You passed out before I could return the favor."

She spun around and suddenly realized her shirt was still open. Quickly she covered herself as her brain began to register what her sensei had just said. Kakashi was sitting up, his eyes smiling at her. Thankfully, the sheet remained in place.

"I… I have to go." It was all she could say. She could barely meet his gaze, her eyes wide and cheeks flushed.

"Not yet," he replied as he pulled the sheet away and moved to stand up. Her hand shot up as her head turned to focus on the door behind her.

"No, no. Don't get up. I really, _really_ need to go. Um, we can talk later, 'kay?"

With skirt in one hand and shirt held shut with the other, she turned swiftly to the door, ready to bolt. 'Please, don't let him say anything. I can't deal with this _now_,' she begged any deity that would listen.

She had just made it out of the bedroom and was about to close the door behind her when she heard something. It took her ears a moment to decipher what it was exactly. Laughter. It wasn't coming from Kakashi, though. He wasn't even there, she realized, glancing back toward the bed. The noise grew as the room began to morph into another setting: Naruto's bedroom.

That's when she saw them. Her teammates were leaning on each other for support as they guffawed hysterically, no longer able to maintain the genjutsu.

They were too distracted to defend themselves, and Sakura was quite pleased with the Naruto and Sasuke shaped holes left in the blond's bedroom wall. She'd have to remember to thank Tsunade again for showing her how to charge her punches with charka, but first, she wanted some answers.

"You don't think we went too far that time?" Naruto asked as he offered to help his teammate up from the ground a good 50 meters from the apartment. Ignoring the hand in front of him, he dark-haired teen seemed to consider the thought as he got up on his own and brushed the dirt off his pants. A smirk and shake of head answered the blond before Sasuke even spoke.

"Sakura's use of genjutsu is well above our own. I know you're used to losing, dead last, but I plan on winning this little bet."

"Asshole," he grumbled as he twisted his body, popping his back. Crashing through walls hurt! "I want to win, too, but she is our teammate."

"Oh, I don't doubt she'll be pissed for a while," Sasuke laughed. "You know she's plotting revenge as we speak. But don't forget this was all her idea."

"Yeah. Yeah," with a wave of the hand, the blond responded.

The sound of a door closing caught their attention, and the two looked up to see Sakura quickly bound down the steps of the apartment building and over toward them. Naruto noticed with relief that the vein in her forehead appeared to be protruding less than it was a few moments ago. Maybe they'd be able to walk away without getting the crap kicked out of them again.

"Okay, whose idea was _that_?" she asked with a raised eyebrow, unable to stop the shudder that ran through her body. Her focus shifted between the two silent teenagers who looked quite pleased with themselves. She didn't miss the fact, though, that they had made sure to keep their distance from her.

"I have to admit, you got me with that one. Must be the hangover or something," she added with a laugh as she rubbed her temple.

"So, ready to admit defeat yet?" Sasuke asked coolly.

"Ha! You wish. You guys better watch your backs. I've been nice until now, but after this morning, there's no reason to keep playing around. I mean really, Kakashi-sensei? That's just creepy." She crossed her arms over her chest and eyed them warily. As if on cue, the silver haired jounin appeared behind the sixteen year old kunoichi.

"Who's creepy?" he asked with a smile as he peeked up from behind his newest book. A surprised Sakura jumped twice as high as she normally could.

"Sensei! Eh heh heh." She tried to act normal, but with the blush and the extremely guilty expression, she was failing miserably.

"Yeah, Sakura. What was that creepy comment about?" Sasuke asked not bothering to hide the smirk. Her elbow in his gut managed to get rid of it, though.

"Nothing," she muttered giving her teammates a sideways glance before trying to change the subject. "So, what are you doing here?"

Kakashi eyed his students' grinning not-so-innocently faces for a moment, knowing they were up to something and wondering if he really wanted to know what it was. He shook his head, deciding it would be best to just not worry about it for now. "I was just on my way to get some breakfast."

"Alright! Can we come, too?" Naruto asked.

"You can, but that doesn't mean I'll buy you anything," was the reply from the scarred ninja.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto cried, holding his chest as if the statement actually hurt, before turning to his teammates. "So, you wanna go eat? I'm starving, and _we_ don't have a problem buying our own food, do we?" he added as he cast a glance back at Kakashi. Sakura was unsure whether her stomach was really ready for food but seeing that everyone else wanted to go, she nodded her agreement, and the four started off toward a nearby eatery.

Sakura bit her lip as she traveled the dirt road a few steps behind them, watching Naruto's animated one sided conversation with the team leader. The effects of this morning were beginning to sink in, and she was desperately trying to clear her mind of the thoughts and images that appeared every time she looked at the man she'd 'woken up with' less than an hour earlier. Even though she knew it was an illusion, the images of Kakashi's naked body next to hers just seemed too real. It was harder to shake off than she thought it would be.

'Oh, hell. Was I just staring at his ass!' 'Yes. Yes, you were. Freak!' Inner Sakura laughed.

She silently reprimanded herself and forced her eyes to look elsewhere. She never thought Kakashi was unattractive really. She'd just never given it much thought with him being older and all. But seeing him up close and personal like that was causing her to consider things she really wished she wasn't.

'Damn those assholes!' she growled inwardly, wondering exactly how long it'd be before she could act normal around him again. 'They're _so_ going to pay!' The question was how. She'd bluffed earlier about her evil intentions concerning their little genjutsu contest. Sure she knew battle tactics, but she'd never thought to use sex or its implications in an illusion before. It really was brilliant. Must've been Sasuke's idea, she mused, realizing that neither had owned up to it.

Chewing on her thumbnail, she tried to think of something they would find horrific to use against them. Her eyebrows dipped in concentration as she ran the possibilities through her head. Naruto wouldn't be hard to shake, since he was pretty much an open book with his emotions. Mental images of the ramen stand burning to the ground in front of her sobbing teammate made her chuckle. Sasuke, though, was another matter. The only thing that she knew for a fact would rattle him, she'd never use. She wasn't cruel. Besides, this little bet was supposed to be fun, not tear the team apart.

'Hmm, maybe I should go more for mildly disturbing instead' After all, it's not as if she found the idea of fooling around with Kakashi emotionally scarring or anything. She groaned, thinking perhaps _that_ was the most disturbing realization she'd had all morning. Naruto heard and glanced back at her.

"You okay, Sakura-chan?" he asked with a smile. It appeared to be sincere, but she wasn't fully convinced.

"Fine," she replied nonchalantly. Inner Sakura was cracking her knuckles, though. Just because she wasn't scarred for life after this morning didn't necessarily mean the situation wasn't meant to. 'Heh, scarred for life it is,' she decided with a very satisfactory grin. She just had to wait for the right moment.

With that decided, her thoughts drifted to the other problem at hand. She still couldn't remember everything that happened the night before. She sighed, knowing there was only one way to find out.

"Um, Naruto?"

"Yeah?" He noticed the change in her tone immediately and slowed down to walk with her.

"What happened last night? I remember some of it, but…" 'Oh please, don't let me have done anything too embarrassing!'

"Heh. Not much after Sasuke threatened to cut out our vocal cords if we kept singing," he answered sheepishly. When Sakura kept looking at him expectantly, he elaborated, "Well, uh, we watched some TV, played some cards, that's about it. You passed out on the couch, so I moved you to the bed. What? I slept on the floor," he added defensively upon seeing the look on her face.

"Why the floor?"

"Cause asshole was already sprawled out on the couch when I got back," he grumbled, jerking a thumb in Sasuke's direction.

"Sorry. I should've gone home before I got so tipsy. I wonder why Sasuke stayed, though. He must have used up his tolerance for people by that point," she laughed.

"Dunno. I didn't ask. It's not like I care if he felt like staying," he shrugged. "Maybe he thought that if he left us alone, I'd take advantage of your drunkenness and do unspeakable things to you."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Pervert."

Naruto shrugged. "Or," he smirked as another idea entered his head, "Maybe he just didn't want to get left out," he laughed.

"Shut up!" she growled, crossing her arms over her chest in annoyance. Naruto grinned and decided to turn his harassment to another subject.

"So you really thought you did something with Kakashi-sensei? Wow." The disbelief in his voice was obvious. "I never would've guessed you had a thing for older men."

That comment earned him a punch in the face. What she really wanted to do was strangle him for scaring the crap out of her and for even thinking of putting her in a situation like that. But that wouldn't be fair, would it? Sasuke would need to be strangled as well, so she settled for kicking her blond teammate a few times (without chakra because she wasn't _that_ mean.) "I don't, asshole."

Kakashi paused a moment and glanced back at his two bickering students. "It would be best for you two to save that energy for our training session." With that, he turned his attention back to his dirty book and continued walking.

Sakura kicked Naruto one last time before stomping off after Kakashi but not before giving Sasuke a nasty glare.

_TBC_


	2. Would You Like Plums With That?

**A/N:** I'm glad everyone's enjoying this thing. I know I'm having fun writing it! Sorry to disappoint anyone who doesn't like NaruSasu, though, but this fic will have it. It won't be anything explicit since this story's not NC-17, but there will be a few sexual situations. That's why I listed all pairings in the beginning. I don't want to surprise anyone with something they really didn't want to read.

**Pairings**: None this chapter, but eventual NaruSasu, NaruSaku, SasuSaku

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto. I just like to play with the characters from time to time. XD

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 2: Would You Like Plums With That?**

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She rolled her eyes as her attempts at ignoring the nearby conversation failed. Did Naruto always have to be so _loud_? Shaking her head, Sakura resumed picking at her breakfast. She didn't really feel like eating, but if they were about to train, she knew she'd need _something_ in her stomach. The only thing her body really seemed to want at the moment, though, was water and maybe some more sleep.

"And _then_," Naruto continued in his usual overly boisterous voice between mouthfuls of food complete with over-exaggerated hand gestures, "He had the nerve to spend all _my_ money on sake for these two women he had no chance with at all."

Sakura's eyebrow twitched. 'How many times is he going to tell everyone that damn story?' One glance at Sasuke told her he was thinking the exact same thing.

Kakashi, having inhaled his food at a record speed once again, only chuckled from behind his book as he waited for everyone else to finish eating, and Sakura couldn't help but wonder if he knew something she didn't. She'd always found that particular story rather sad. Pathetic even. Wasn't Jiraiya supposed to be one of the legendary Sannin? But then again, all three had turned out a little strange, hadn't they? Maybe that was where the amusement was, she decided.

Even though Naruto had finished his tale and had shifted his attention to finishing his food, the pounding in her head remained. Training was only going to make it worse, she realized, so Sakura began rerouting the chakra in her body and tried to focus healing energies to her head. Unfortunately, it took some serious effort, since the alcohol in her system had somewhat disrupted her energy flow. After a few minutes, though, the pain had lessened significantly. It was still an annoyance, but at least she'd be able to train.

The feeling of contentment quickly passed, though, as Sakura felt eyes on her once again and looked up only to find Naruto and Sasuke quickly devouring their rice. Okay, that was seriously getting annoying. She knew they were watching her, waiting to see if she'd react and hoping to catch her discomfort in being near their team leader after this morning's illusion.

'Assholes. Both of them,' Inner Sakura muttered. 'I _still_ can't believe they fooled me so easily!'

When she thought about it, though, she had to admit (however begrudgingly) that her teammates had done a rather decent job with that genjutsu. She'd never been to Kakashi-sensei's place, so that part was easy enough to fake. The mask… well, none of them had seen him without it, so it only made sense to leave it on. In fact, she was glad they did. It would've been too much of a tease to think she'd seen his face only to find out later it was just an illusion. Besides, it seemed fitting in a bizarre Kakashi-sensei sort of way for him to still have it on while not wearing anything else.

What she couldn't figure out – and this one was driving her absolutely nuts – was when they'd seen her underwear. Had one of them gone through her stuff? Had they watched her change yesterday? Her eyes narrowed. She had to admit the idea of Sasuke spying on her didn't anger her nearly as much as it should have, but Naruto…

'Oh shit. What if one of them peeked while I was passed out?'

Inner Sakura was screaming expletives that would've made Kakashi blush. That was it. It didn't matter _how_ they knew about her red and white polka dotted panties. She was going to smack them around severely. She felt the wood of her chopsticks begin to give and had to force herself to calm down before they snapped in her hand.

'I'm going to need something _good_ to get them back with. I could do what they did and make them think they had sex with someone.' She snorted and quickly discarded the idea. 'That wouldn't be much of a payback, would it? Unless… Oh ho ho! That's the one!' She knew what she was going to do and had to struggle to keep straight face at the thought. It was just a matter of waiting for the right moment.

Sakura took another bite of rice and decided she was definitely done. She dropped the chopsticks in the bowl and shoved it away from her. Her head felt better, but her stomach was still unsettled. 'Maybe it's more from nerves than the hangover.'

"You didn't eat much," Kakashi commented as he turned the page of his book.

"I'm not very hungry," she shrugged, trying to act like it was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Well, if you're done, we should go," Kakashi commented as he stood and slipped the book back in his pouch. The four of them paid for their meals and began their walk toward the training grounds.

Glancing down at the clothes she'd been wearing since the day before, she grimaced. She hadn't even brushed her teeth yet! Her mouth opened to tell them she'd meet them there in a few minutes, but she quickly stopped herself. No matter how icky she felt or how innocent it had been, she _really_ didn't want to have to explain the situation to Kakashi. At least not at the moment. The less she had to be subjected to his evaluating stare _today_, the better.

'I'm a shinobi. I can handle a day without basic hygiene,' she tried to tell herself, unable to keep from cringing. At least she wasn't the only one who hadn't been home yet. Sakura took great pleasure in knowing that Sasuke was feeling just as grungy as she was.

The group took to the trees once they made it to the edge of the woods with Kakashi in the lead and Sasuke several meters off to the side. Naruto appeared right next to her with a devious grin on his face.

"Liking the view, Sakura-chan?"

She gave him a sideways glance before looking ahead to see what he was babbling about. Kakashi was in front of them, bending into a crouch each time he landed on another branch. She rolled her eyes.

"This is me ignoring you," she smirked.

Naruto seemed to think about it for a second. "Well, I guess that wouldn't be much compared to the eye-full you got this morning."

Her eyebrow quirked upward at that comment. "What? Sensei in a sheet?" She almost laughed. He had a nice chest. She'd admit that, but it was still just a chest. Not exactly what she'd call an eye-full.

"Oh, yeah right. Come off it. We saw you peek. I had no idea you were such a naughty girl." The blonde's smile got impossibly wider as he wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Sakura grimaced, thinking Naruto looked entirely too amused by _that_ idea.

"But _man_, you should've seen Sasuke's face. I thought his eyes were gonna fall out of his head," he snickered.

Her jaw clenched almost painfully, and she was sure she was blushing. 'Damn it, damn it, _damn_ _it_!' Inner Sakura growled. 'Okay, calm down. Payback is already planned. Keep your cool until then, Sakura.'

She took a deep breath before smirking and turning back to her teammate as she cracked her knuckles.

"You know something, Naruto, I think you _like_ getting your ass kicked, otherwise you wouldn't ask for it so much. I didn't know you were such a masochist."

He stared at her in confusion for a moment, and she had to resist the urge to gloat. "Maso-what?"

"Masochist. It's someone who gets off on pain."

"Whoa, you really are a pervert, aren't you?" he laughed in surprise.

She was unable to stop herself from smacking him upside the head.

"No, dumbass. I'm a medic. Not all the injuries we treat happen in battle."

Naruto blinked slowly as he absorbed that little tidbit. Suddenly he turned toward her, his face a mixture of shock and annoyance. "And you never thought to share this information!"

Sakura burst into a fit of laughter, momentarily forgetting she was supposed to be angry with him.

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Their training session had been long and irritating. Her teammates still seemed to be anticipating some sort of reaction from their tacky illusion. Naruto even had the gall to glance at Kakashi then back to her and quirk his eyebrows suggestively. She was _almost_ tempted to start flirting with the older man or kiss him or something just to give them something to actually gawk at.

'Don't let it get to you. You'll just give them more ammunition,' she kept telling herself. Freaking out would only clue them in on just how much this morning had unsettled her. She could wait for revenge so long as their goading didn't escalate beyond what it already was. A few teasing comments and lewd gestures never killed anyone.

Instead, Sakura settled on burning up her aggression while sparring. Kakashi had split them up into pairs and traded with her halfway through, allowing her ample time to give each of them a satisfactory beating. That was enough to appease her bloodlust for the time being.

When the session ended late that afternoon, the three of them were sitting on the ground starving and worn out.

"Listen up. We have a mission tomorrow, so I hope you got whatever it was out of your systems. I don't want personal squabbles distracting anyone." Kakashi's exposed eye shifted from one team member to the next waiting for their acknowledgement.

"Yes, Sensei," the three grumbled in unison.

"Good. Let's meet up at the gate at 0700. We'll be spending at least one night away possibly two, so pack accordingly."

The three nodded, and with that, Kakashi disappeared into the trees.

Sakura flopped backwards onto the grass as she stared up at the sky. Exhaustion was starting to get to her, especially since she didn't eat much of a breakfast, and they'd skipped lunch altogether.

"Man, I'm hungry," she muttered, smiling to herself when her teammates mumbled their agreements. "I would kill for some of the old lady's fresh plums right now."

"Strawberries," Naruto interjected.

"Yeah, with a dash of sugar," she agreed. "Or peaches. Maybe even some mangoes if she has any this time of year."

"Alright, let's go," Naruto decided as he hauled himself up off the ground and then moved to pull Sakura to her feet. She smirked inwardly. Sometimes it was just too easy. "Come on, Sasuke!" the blonde yelled over his shoulder at his other teammate.

"Whatever. I'm going home," the dark-haired ninja mumbled.

Sakura was quickly dragged down the dirt road with Sasuke following. Not because he had any interest in accompanying them or anything, though. Their destination just happened to be in the same direction as his home.

"Naruto, slow down," she complained, wrenching her wrist away from him so she could walk at a more reasonable pace.

"Eh, sorry," he grinned sheepishly. "I guess I'm pretty hungry."

"So I am, but I'm also freaking _tired_. We shouldn't have skipped lunch."

"Yeah, Kakashi-sensei probably did that on purpose," Naruto pouted.

"Well, if you two hadn't been acting like such obvious retards… Did you seriously think he wouldn't notice?" she growled as her arms crossed over her chest.

"Like he _didn't_ notice you beating up Naruto on the way to breakfast?" Sasuke snorted. "Don't blame it all on us."

Sakura's only response was a sideways glare as the trio finally made it to their destination. It was just a typical vendor stand as the lady didn't have enough stuff to need a large store, but this one always had the freshest produce. More than a few of the villagers speculated on what kind of connections the elderly woman had to always have such stock.

"Good afternoon," the woman greeted when they approached. "Oh, look at what strong, handsome young men you two are becoming!" she added as she usually did. And as usual, Naruto grinned awkwardly while Sasuke seemed to ignore the comment altogether.

"And look at you," she smiled, turning her attention to Sakura. "You must be happy about having such handsome teammates."

"Oh, yes. They're definitely… _something_," the pink-haired kunoichi smirked in response. Sasuke sneered at her but then rolled his eyes when she stuck her tongue out at him before turning her attention back to the vendor in front of them.

The woman had to be close to 70, Sakura guessed from the lines in her face and the spots on her hands. She was always friendly, and for a moment, the young kunoichi felt a twinge of guilt for what she was about to do. But then she remembered the obscene gesture Sasuke had made with his hand and mouth during their spar.

No, she'd feel no guilt over this at all. It was necessary, and payback would be oh so sweet.

Sakura quickly scanned over the bins until she found what she was looking for and snatched up three pieces of fruit.

"I'll take these." She gave the woman the money and stuffed two of the plums in her bag. She was so hungry that she was going to eat the other one right there.

Taking a rather large bite of the fruit, Sakura moaned. She actually moaned! Hell, she didn't care. She was starving, and it was _good_.

"MMmmmm." Her eyes closed in what looked like pure bliss. Even Sasuke paused to watch the spectacle. Her head tipped back just a bit, and a small bit of juice glistened on her lips. She swallowed the first bite and licked the juice away. "_So_ good," she groaned in a low, throaty voice.

Well, Naruto was sold, and Sasuke even seemed to consider it as he joined him in front of the portion of the stand that held the plums. Whether it was because of her production or their own hunger, she didn't know nor did it matter. They were right where she wanted them.

Sakura smirked and waited until the old woman turned around to sort through a crate behind the stand to make her move. She didn't really want her involved anyway, just her likeness. Quickly, her hands formed the seals, trapping the unaware teens in the jutsu.

Suddenly the woman appeared nude between Naruto and Sasuke with an arm draped over the shoulders of each.

"So which one of you hot, young things wants my mouth, and which one wants the other end?" she asked with a wide, toothless smile. "I have this trick I can do with my tongue…"

The jutsu didn't last long. Sakura suspected it wouldn't, but the looks on their faces proved the illusion had its desired effect. Besides, the moment those two decided it would be funny to make her think she'd given their sensei a show and a blow job, the competition shifted from quality genjutsu to shock value.

She bit her lip as her teammates turned and glared at her as they came back to reality. Naruto had stabbed himself in the hand with a kunai, while blood trickled from Sasuke's mouth apparently from biting his own tongue. The pair actually looked _nauseous_, and Sakura could no longer stifle her amusement at the situation. 'Oh yes, payback's a bitch, huh, boys?'

"S..Sakura-chan?" Naruto sounded almost in pain, and it only made her laugh harder. She was hunched over, propped up with one hand on her knee. The other hand gripped her side as the muscles began to ache.

"Sorry, I'm not very hungry now," the blond mumbled and turned to continue walking toward Sasuke's place. They were going to need a battle plan, it appeared. The youngest Uchiha glowered at Sakura a moment longer as she attempted to get control of herself before he turned to follow Naruto.

"See you guys tomorrow," she called after them in a sing-song voice as she tried to stand up straight. The back of her hand rested on her overheated forehead as she tried to calm herself. She couldn't quit smiling for anything. Deciding that today hadn't turned out so bad after all, Sakura started off in the direction of her home, leaving a very bewildered fruit vendor to try to figure out what the hell happened.

_TBC_


	3. Back To Work

**A/N:** I apologize for the extreme lateness of this. Computer problems just ate about two months of my life, and then I just got distracted. Bad author! And if certain events seem somewhat out of character, don't freak out. I have a plan. All will be made clear later.

**Pairings**: None this chapter but eventual SasuSaku, NaruSaku, and NaruSasu and possibly NaruSakuSasu (still deciding after the dialogue took on a life of its own in this chapter)

**Warnings:** Underage drinking and perverted teenage ponderings

**Disclaimer:** As previously stated, I do not own Naruto. Which is terribly sad. I'd love to have me some hot ninja... what?

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 3: Back To Work**

**

* * *

**

"This is getting out of hand," Naruto sighed as he paced back and forth in his friend's living room. "I thought for sure she'd give up after this morning."

"I have to admit, I didn't expect her to play so dirty," Sasuke chuckled.

It was such a rare noise to be heard, Naruto couldn't help but look over at his teammate in surprise. The bastard was actually grinning as if the situation had caused his respect for her to go up a few notches. It probably did, he mentally scoffed before turning his attention back to their problem.

"How can we beat that? It was downright nasty!" The blonde shuddered again wishing he could just dump battery acid on the part of his brain that stored _that_ memory.

"It's not going to be easy. She'll be expecting something big. We'll have to catch her off guard somehow. Confuse her."

"But how? Sakura-chan's smarter than we are."

"Smarter than you maybe," he snorted. "What has always been her biggest weakness?"

Naruto froze midstep and locked eyes with him. He knew the answer to that question, and he wasn't sure he liked where Sasuke was going with this.

"What exactly are you thinking of doing?"

"Surprising her and then confusing her," he stated calmly.

* * *

7AM rolled around rather quickly for the members of team seven. A little _too_ early for his teammates, Sasuke noted with annoyance as he watched the two drag themselves half-asleep and loaded down with gear to the village gates. 

"Morning, Sasuke-kun," Sakura managed to get out between yawns. A faint nod was his only acknowledgement that she'd said anything. Even her current state of sleepiness wasn't enough to keep her from smiling this morning. He decided to take that as a bad sign.

Naruto, Sasuke noticed, was as oblivious as always. The loudest of the trio dropped his pack on the ground and stretched a moment before quickly sitting down next to it. His eyes looked like they were still shut as he scratched his head and muttered, "Stupid Sensei can't even show up on time for missions."

Out of the corner of his eye, Sasuke shifted his attention back to his other teammate. She was grinning even wider. 'Here it comes,' he thought.

"What's the matter Naruto? Didn't sleep well?"

For a second, the blonde looked like he wanted to jump up and argue with her but then seemed to think better of it as he yawned. "It could've been better," he grumbled.

Sakura smiled at that, and Sasuke realized it had been a while since he'd seen her look so utterly pleased with herself. Thankfully, he was spared the ponderings of any more observations of his noisy teammates when Kakashi appeared from out of nowhere once again.

"Yo."

"You're late!" Naruto growled.

"Ah, yes, but only by twenty minutes," he grinned. "Ready to go?"

The suggestion was met with only mild complaint from Naruto who was grumbling about how that extra twenty minutes could've been spent in bed. Their sensei already had his orange book out, though. 'Probably to tune the idiot out,' Sasuke assumed. 'Or at least make him think he is.'

"So what's our mission?" Sakura asked as they passed through the gate.

"Protection, C rank," Kakashi started. "The son of an eastern territory daimyo near the Fire Country border is getting married." The teenagers stopped in their tracks.

"We're going to a wedding?" Sakura asked in disbelief.

"Yep," the man smiled, and Sasuke thought Kakashi-sensei really did look entirely too amused by the fact.

"Aww," Naruto groaned. "Why do we keep getting stuck with all these lame missions?"

Sasuke didn't miss the way Sakura cringed and glanced his direction out of the corner of her eye.

"Well, there has been a lot of tension from the bordering territories lately. That's why we were hired. There's a chance we might see some action," the jounin offered.

"Yeah right," the blonde mumbled.

"Shut up, moron. At least they're letting us out of the village again," Sasuke growled, unable to ignore him any longer.

"Yeah? And who's fault do you think that is," Naruto snapped back.

"Guys!" Sakura yelled, effectively pulling their attention toward her. "Let's just go, okay? We have a job to do." Suddenly she looked tired again as her eyes shifted back and forth between her teammates.

Sasuke looked away first, huffing in irritation as he followed Kakashi. He could hear Sakura and Naruto whispering behind him, and although he couldn't really make out all of what they were saying, he could easily fill in the gaps. It made his jaw clench painfully.

"If you're going to talk about me, at least do it where I can't fucking hear," he snarled before quickening his pace to put some distance between them. The last thing he heard besides their footsteps was Sakura smacking Naruto upside the head and his irritated demand of 'What did I do?'

By the time they broke for lunch, though, Naruto had long since forgotten any frustration he'd held earlier that morning and was prattling on about how, if needed, he would save the wedding and the bride would be so grateful that she'd kiss him in front of everyone.

No one noticed Sasuke's snort over Sakura's howling laughter.

"I think…" she began between giggles. "I think you spent _way_ too much time with that old pervert!"

"Who? Kakashi-sensei?" the blonde joked.

"Oi," Kakashi complained as he returned from a quick trip to the bushes.

"No," Sakura answered as she tried not to smile.

"Oh, right. He's the _middle_-_aged_ pervert," Naruto added with a wink. Sakura tried not to laugh, but it only lasted a second before she snorted then started giggling again. Naruto was grinning ear to ear, and Sasuke couldn't help but smirk a little himself. Kakashi, on the other hand, did not look amused.

"I am _not_ middle-aged," he said wryly, and Sakura erupted in another fit of laughter. "Let's go," he sighed. "If we hurry, we can make it before sundown."

The last leg of the trip definitely held a lighter mood. Naruto and Sakura were talking about this and that and somehow managed, to Sasuke's complete surprise, not get on his nerves. In fact, he found the situation rather interesting. 'At least it keeps them occupied and out of my face.'

Until, of course, they started arguing again.

Sasuke hadn't heard what started it, but he didn't miss the "Ugh, you pervert!" Sakura screeched, immediately followed by the "I'm surprised you _didn't_ go for the old lady!"

"Eww! That's disgusting! Why would I want some wrinkled up old hag?"

"Better than nothing," she sneered.

"And what makes you think I'm not getting any?" the blonde smiled as if it were obvious he was the playboy of the village or something. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you're _you_."

An indecipherable expression flashed across Naruto's face, but just as soon as it happened, it was gone.

"Just because you want someone like…" he trailed off and nodded his head toward Kakashi, causing Sakura's eyes to flash murderously for a moment, "Doesn't mean everyone else does. I've met quite a few girls who liked confident blondes." He grinned widely and quirked his eyebrows up a few times for good measure.

Sakura gave him a long, considering – and possibly skeptical – look before allowing herself to smirk. Sasuke wondered what she was up to.

"I never said you were bad to look at," she commented, and then added under her breath, "Once you get used to the orange anyway."

"Oh yeah?" Naruto was trying to not look surprised, to play it cool with a smirk of his own. He only half-way succeeded.

Sasuke fought hard not to snort. If the moron was too dense to realize she was setting him up, he saw no reason to enlighten him.

"Yeah," Sakura shrugged. "You just ruin it every time you open your mouth."

"OI!"

* * *

As planned, the group reached their destination just before sunset. The estate was nice, not that it surprised any of them. Anyone willing to hire a team of ninja for a wedding obviously had some money to throw around. They were greeted at the gate by two guards who escorted them inside what – if the elaborate decoration was any indication – was the main house. They were instructed to wait in the foyer with one of the guards while the other notified the daimyo of their arrival. 

Naruto snorted and leaned toward Sasuke. "What's the point? 'Snot like he could stop even Sakura-chan," he whispered. Not surprisingly, she elbowed him hard enough to make him double over.

A throat cleared from the doorway, and the teenagers turned to see the guard had returned. Behind him was a garishly dressed and overweight man who had probably more hair on his face than his head.

"Welcome. I hope your trip was a pleasant one."

"Oh yes. It was fine," Kakashi replied, taking on the duty of introducing himself and his team and clearing up mission details. The three teens stood there, listening to the exchange and decided that, like some of the people of power who'd hired them before, the daimyo appeared to be involved in some shady dealings.

'It explained why he hired ninja at least,' Sasuke concluded.

An invitation to dinner was made but declined on the basis of needing to get a layout of the grounds and plan security detail, much to Sasuke's pleasure. They were here to do a job, not socialize with a bunch of snooty assholes, not that he couldn't be just as snooty an asshole, but that was beside the point.

The man nodded and ordered one of his guards to show them around and answer any questions before scurrying off, allowing them to finally get to work.

* * *

The three collectively sighed upon seeing the room they were to share for the duration of their stay. It was small, and they were going to be a little cramped. Luckily, there would be only three of them at most sleeping at any given time as one would be on patrol. They'd be practically on top of each other if they had to squeeze a forth bedroll in there. 

"You believe that crap about only having the one room empty?" Naruto asked as he dropped his pack on the floor under the window.

Sasuke shrugged and began searching the room for traps and bugging equipment. "Doesn't matter. It's better for us to stay together anyway."

"I know that!" the blonde snapped. "I'm just saying with a place this big, I doubt having enough rooms is really a problem for him. I'm gonna be pissed if I wake up with your foot in my face or something."

Sasuke rolled his eyes and moved to look out the window.

"Tomorrow's going to stink," Sakura grumbled as she sat down on her bedroll.

Sasuke's expression told them he agreed.

"Why do _I_ get stuck inside with the guests?" she complained before quickly amending. "I mean, I know _why_, but still, I don't want to be in there by myself. At least you guys don't have to talk to anyone." Her eyes widened when a particularly disturbing possibility hit her. "Oh, they better not make me wear some horrible, overly-stuffy _thing_ that I won't be able to fight in if something happens!"

"It's not like anything will happen anyway."

Her only response to the blonde was a glare. He shrugged.

"Oh, come on. I know I'm not the only one thinking this mission is a joke. Even _if_ someone tries to crash the wedding, it'd take a whole squad of upper level shinobi to take us out, so I wouldn't worry too much about your clothes getting in your way. Although, if they did get in the way, you could always tear them off," he offered giving her a once over.

Sakura's eyes narrowed. "Naruto…"

His hands went up in surrender at her warning. "Okay, okay. Look, I can't do anything about tomorrow, but tonight…." Naruto grinned mischievously as he pulled a bottle out of his bag.

Sakura blinked as she watched her teammate remove the foil and cork. "You know, some people say bringing alcohol on a mission is a sure sign of dependency."

Naruto grinned when Sasuke suddenly forgot about the grounds outside their room and turned his attention back to them.

"I didn't _bring_ it," the blonde defended. "I snuck it from the kitchen earlier. They have so much stuff down there, they won't miss it, and we have exactly three hours and…" He quickly looked down to check his watch. "Twenty-six minutes until Kakashi-sensei's patrol is over." He smiled, took a long pull from the bottle, and passed it to Sasuke.

"So you're going to get drunk? You patrol next, idiot," Sasuke scoffed before taking his own large gulp. "What is this stuff anyway?"

"Dunno, and I'm not getting drunk, just a little buzz or something."

"Idiot."

The bottle was then passed to Sakura who inspected the label before anything else. "It's imported, probably expensive," she noted before taking a quick test sip. "And not that good either," she added while making a face. It didn't stop her from taking another, larger drink, though.

"Listen to you. 'It's not that good.'" Naruto mimicked her voice as best he could. "You call _me_ an alcoholic, but you're the one talking like miss know-it-all drinker." He took another pull from the bottle and was already beginning to feel a slight numbness spread from his throat. It was pretty good stuff, he decided, noticing they'd barely made a dent in the bottle. 'I might get a little drunk after all.'

"I didn't mean it like that, and you know it," Sakura replied. "It doesn't take experience to know if something tastes bad or not."

Naruto shrugged and passed the bottle to Sasuke who had a thoughtful expression on his face.

"He's going to know. Kakashi's sense of smell is legendary." He took a swig and passed it to Sakura.

"So?" Naruto shrugged.

"So, we'll be asleep. It won't really matter much for us. But you don't think he's going to ignore the fact that you were drinking before going on duty, do you?" Sakura added.

"It's too late now, so why worry about it. Unless you just have Sensei on the brain still," the blonde chuckled.

"Not any more than you were thinking of the old lady," Sakura sneered. She moved to hand him the bottle but pulled it out of his reach as soon as he went for it. She giggled and then snorted. The boys burst into laughter at that, and Naruto quickly snatched the bottle away from her.

"Light weight," he laughed.

"Jerk."

"Pervert."

Sakura sputtered at that one. "How the hell do you figure that? It better not be about that stupid sheet, because a girl _needs_ to know whether or not the person next to her is naked!" She blushed then glanced at Sasuke who appeared more amused by the situation than anything else.

"Actually, I was talking about the old woman asking for a threesome. _You_ did that," he chuckled, drinking from his pilfered bottle. "And _that_ is why you're a pervert."

She rolled her eyes. "You forget the two of you are acting as a team. If I have to get both of you, my options are kind of limited."

Sasuke drank, then Sakura, then Naruto again as the group fell silent. Sakura was the one to finally break it a little while later.

"Do you really think something like that works? I mean, I know people _can_ do it. I just wonder if it really is…. I don't know… worthwhile. It seems like one person would get overwhelmed trying to please the other two or something."

"Whoa, you really _have_ thought about it," Naruto laughed. Sakura just shrugged and took another drink. She looked like she was feeling pretty good right then, the blonde noticed.

"Not in a 'Wow, I'd like to try that' sense. I'm just curious what the attraction is really."

The three thought about it a moment.

"I guess it could be a little much. The person would need a lot of stamina or be able to multi-task well so one of them wouldn't feel left out," Sasuke offered much to Sakura's surprise, if her wide-eyed expression was any indication.

"No way, man! You just suck. If it's too much work, you could always get the other person to help," Naruto added with a laugh.

"We're speaking hypothetically, moron," Sasuke grumbled, looking like he regretted even joining the conversation.

"Yeah, but then you're getting into a whole other topic there," Sakura commented. "Not everyone swings both ways."

Naruto snorted. "What are you doing, writing a book? Only you could think so much while drunk."

"Shut up," she complained, though the demand had no real force behind it.

"Hey, if you're that curious, I bet Kakashi-sensei would loan you one of his books."

"Ugh, no thanks," she grimaced, holding the bottle up to the light and shaking it. "There's only a sip left in here."

"Take it," Naruto waved off as he reclined back against the wall. "It's probably nothing but backwash anyway."

Sakura paused, the bottle only an inch from her lips, and quickly set it back down on the floor. "That's okay."

It's a good thing they'd run out, Naruto decided, as he watched Sakura lie down on her side and absent-mindedly play with her hair. She didn't need any more.

"Hey, bastard, you bring your mouthwash?"

The dark-haired teen just raised an eyebrow.

"I was thinking that if I could smell it on you from half-way across a room, then maybe we could use it to cover up the alcohol. What did ya think I wanted it for?"

"With you, I can only guess," Sasuke snorted. "It's in the top pouch of my pack."

"Oh, well hey, don't bother reaching over and grabbing it for me or anything, ya know, since it's right next to you and all," Naruto grumbled as he stepped over his teammate's legs to get to his bag.

"I won't, and get your ass out of my face."

"Hmmm?" the blonde replied innocently as he wiggled his butt in front of him. Sakura sounded like she was choking on her laughter which only encouraged him more.

Until, of course, a kick sent him flying across the room.

* * *

_TBC_


	4. Don't Eat the Crab Dip

**A/N: **Big thanks to Cindelius for keeping me from looking like an idiot The original (and probably less entertaining) version of the waking up scene is posted as chapter 5 of cracktastic shorts if you're interested.

**Pairings: **a little SasuSaku and NaruSaku in this chapter with eventual NaruSasu in future chapters and possibly NaruSakuSasu

**Warnings: **the usual: language, awkward moments, a grope or two. Nothing major

**Disclaimer**: If I owned it, the entire village would be my harem. Muwahaha. coughs It's probably a good thing I don't.

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 4: Don't Eat The Crab Dip**

**

* * *

**

Sakura's morning had started out normal enough. Get up, use the restroom, wash face, brush teeth, change clothes. She'd gone outside to do a few exercises and a light meditation so she wouldn't disturb the still sleeping forms of her loudmouthed teammate and their admittedly perverted – though it had been more a lack of denying the accusation than actual admission, but it was all the same to Sakura – team leader.

She'd picked a clear open area on the grounds away from the annoying guards to begin her exercises, and she'd waved upon seeing Sasuke, who was still on what the three had lovingly named The Butt-Crack of Dawn Shift, up on the roof. Sakura stifled a laugh, trying to remember exactly when they'd renamed the shifts. It'd been a while, she realized, not long after they'd become team seven, but by habit, she still referred to them as such. What Kakashi had done – a typical night shift – was known as The Easy Shift. Okay, so it wasn't the most interesting name, but it fit. You could do it and still get a decent amount of sleep in afterward. The next one, the one Naruto had pulled, was appropriately called The I'm a Kickass Shinobi That Doesn't Need No Stinkin' Sleep Shift, and yes, Naruto had come up with the name for that one. You could nap before and/or after, but no matter how you swung it, you were going to feel like shit the next day. But ninja learned to love sleep deprivation, so it didn't really matter all that much.

Sakura cringed as she thought about the fact that tonight would be her turn in the rotation for The I Don't Need Sleep Shift (Sakura's abbreviated version) since the party was supposed to last well into The Easy Shift. 'At least we'll be on our way home tomorrow,' she thought in consolation. Short missions like these didn't drain a person too much luckily.

She shook her head to clear it of thought and turned her attention to the task she'd set out to do: her exercises. It was shortly after she'd finished that things began to go wrong.

She was on her way back to the room to get some breakfast when she passed Kakashi just outside the building. "Morning Sensei."

"Sakura, there's breakfast in the dining room if you're hungry. I'm on my way to relieve Sasuke before we get started today. I want all of you to meet me on the roof in thirty minutes. Can you tell Naruto?"

"Okay," she replied, and with a nod, he was gone.

It only took one peek inside the crowded dining room for Sakura to decide she'd stick with the food she'd brought with her. 'I wonder if Kakashi-sensei actually ate in there or if he just grabbed a few muffins to munch on before we meet him on the roof.' She huffed at the thought of an entire room full of strangers getting to see his face when they'd known him for four years already and had yet to come close.

As she walked into their room, she realized with a sigh that their team leader had just left her with the task of waking Naruto up. The blond was sprawled out on his stomach, half on the floor, half on the bedroll. The cover had been kicked off. She rolled her eyes. 'Like a little kid,' she thought as she began rummaging through her things for her protein bars. 'At least he finally quit wearing that stupid hat. Ah, there they are.'

"Hey, Naruto," she called over to him as she zipped her bag back up. He didn't move.

"Come on. It's time to get up, lazy."

Still nothing. She sighed and walked over next to him.

"I've got some raaaamen," she tempted as she nudged his shoulder with her foot. He mumbled something into his pillow, turned his head the other way, and then was still once again. 'I can't believe _that_ one didn't work,' she thought in disbelief and quickly growing irritation. "Get up!" she growled and kicked him in the side.

Well, that worked. In less than a second, Sakura found herself shoved against the far wall with a forearm against her chest and kunai at her throat. Naruto blinked sleepily at her for a moment before his eyes widened in recognition. He immediately released her, putting some distance between them.

"Oh, shit, Sakura-chan. Sorry," he apologized, raking a hand through his wild hair as he turned and tossed the weapon onto his bedroll, unknowingly giving Sakura a nice view of his profile.

The curses were on the tip of her tongue, but any outrage she might've been feeling at her teammate was quickly forgotten as her eyes were drawn from his tired, apologetic face down to… Sakura's eyes widened momentarily before she came to her senses and quickly averted her gaze.

Being the only girl in a group that spends so much time together, she'd become accustomed to the fact that there would inevitably be some awkward moments for her. Like the time she'd reached into the wrong section of her weapons pouch and hurled a tampon at Sasuke while they were training.

Or the time someone farted in the tent and stunk it up so bad her eyes burned. No one ever owned up to _that_ incident, but she suspected it was Kakashi-sensei, considering how amused he had been by the situation.

Or the fact that no amount of griping or slaps to the back of the head seemed to be able to break Naruto's habit of scratching his balls in front of people. She'd become somewhat immune to it in recent years, no longer staring and stuttering in horror, but it still drove her up a wall!

And she wasn't even going to think about the few times someone forgot which sections of the bushes were designated 'girls' and 'boys.'

But _this_ incident had to be the most uncomfortable that she'd ever had the misfortune to be involved in, Sakura decided. She could see Naruto watching her worriedly in the peripheral; however, she was busy staring at everything in the room _but_ him. Her cheeks burned, and she knew she must've been as red as her shirt.

"Eh, Sakura-chan? You okay?"

'Does he not realize?' she wondered. From the way his eyebrows were raising, he was either ignorant of the problem or didn't know the situation _was_ a problem, and she doubted he was _that_ out of touch with the world. 'Which means I'm going to have to point it out to him.' She groaned at the thought. _I am going to kill Kakashi-sensei next time I see him, _Inner Sakura growled.

She coughed and pointedly dropped her eyes to that which she shouldn't have seen this morning before dragging them back up to his face. Naruto blinked and glanced down to see what she was freaking out about.

"Oh."

_Indeed_, Inner Sakura snorted.

"Uh, sorry. It does that, ya know. Nothing personal," he chuckled nervously, and Sakura was glad he at least had the sense to look embarrassed even if it wasn't by much. He'd yet to bother hiding the tent in his pajama pants after all.

"Well, cover it up or something!" she groaned, more than a little flustered. He grabbed his wrist with his other hand, effectively covering his crotch.

"Better?"

Sakura only rolled her eyes. It looked like he was grabbing himself.

"No. Make it go away. I can't talk to you like this."

And now Naruto was laughing at her. She had to resist the urge to punch him.

"I can't right now. Unless you _want_ me to jerk off in front of you." He gave her a questioning look. "I know you're a pervert and all, but we're on a mission. Try to have some self control." The grin on his face was huge. He then had the audacity to wink at her before turning to dig some clothes out of his bag.

"What!" Sakura screeched at his back in disbelief before shaking her head. "Ugh! I'm going to go eat. Kakashi-sensei wants us to meet him on the roof in twenty minutes. Be late and I'll knock your teeth down your throat," she growled, quickly making her way out of the room lest she attack her infuriating, blond teammate.

She could hear him laughing even after the door was shut.

Sakura was halfway down the hall when she realized that during the excitement, she'd managed to crush the protein bar in her hand. "Great," she groaned, glancing back toward their room. There was no _way_ she was going back in there now. Considering their brief conversation, she could very well imagine what he was doing right then. Not that she _wanted_ to, of course. What she wanted was to eat, damn it! With a sigh, she tossed the dilapidated bar into the trash and headed off toward the dining room.

* * *

Twenty minutes later found all four Konoha ninja on the roof of the main building. Naruto was carrying on as usual, and for that Sakura was thankful. It made it much easier to pretend she hadn't just been pressed up against a wall by a half-dressed teammate with morning wood. She didn't have much time to dwell on it luckily, since Kakashi was going over the mission plan one last time.

"Sakura, you'll be inside while they set up, during the wedding and the reception. If anyone asks, you're a distant cousin, though it doesn't really matter. People know there are ninja here, but in case of the people who _don't_, you can blend the easiest and avoid any unnecessary confrontation."

"How much do I need to blend?"

"Dance if someone asks you to dance, just keep an eye open."

"Do I _have_ to?"

"Last I checked, a dance was just a dance," Kakashi replied with a bored look. "You don't have to agree to everyone, but it would look rather odd for you to hide in the corner all evening. The party is supposed to run pretty late," he reminded them.

"I'll patrol the front grounds, Naruto on the roof, and Sasuke has the back. Everyone make sure your radios are set to channel 3."

"What about my holsters?" Sakura asked as she switched her settings.

"Keep them. I have the feeling you won't be out of place with this crowd. Besides, you might need them. Are everyone's ear pieces working? Good," Kakashi replied upon confirmation.

The three stood up, ready to move to their assigned positions.

"One last thing," the scarred ninja added, catching his team's attention. "I know you think this assignment is a joke, but you'd better take it seriously. If I find out the three of you have been drinking on a mission again, it _will_ be in my report to Hokage-sama."

Sakura shot Naruto a nasty glare out the corner of her eye, but he didn't notice. He was too busy looking at their team leader in confusion.

"I found the bottle," he explained blandly.

"Idiot," Sasuke sighed while Sakura slapped the blond upside the head.

"That's all," Kakashi dismissed cheerfully as he turned and jumped down to the grounds.

"I can't believe you threw it away where he could find it," Sakura groaned.

"Hey, I didn't expect him to go through the trash. It's not like I threw it on top or anything. It was in there deep! Uh, at least he was cool with it," Naruto shrugged.

"Just because he hasn't promised to send us off to be tortured by Gai-sensei, doesn't mean he's okay with it."

"It doesn't mean we won't be punished when we get back to Konoha either," Sasuke added to their female teammate's comment before leaping down to the grounds himself.

"Yeah, well, you drank it, too, asshole," Naruto grumbled.

"I heard that," Sasuke's voice crackled through their earpieces.

"Can you see this, then?" Naruto asked, holding up his middle finger to the figure below.

With a sigh, Sakura leaped down off the building also to get to her position.

* * *

The rest of the morning proved to be exceptionally dull. Not that dull was necessarily bad. In fact, she'd already had more than her fair share of excitement for one day, thank you very much, but still, she was _bored_. Sakura watched as people set up chairs, tables, and flower arrangements, sometimes arguing over what went where and how much time was left to finish it all. Naruto's occasional complaints of boredom over the radio weren't helping any either.

The wedding itself wasn't much better. It was on the grounds behind the main house and seemed to drag on and on and on. 'Are all weddings this long?' she wondered as she fought back a yawn, because _damn_.

"Hey, Sakura-chan, I see you," a sing-song voice buzzed into her earpiece. Apparently she wasn't the only one needing something to occupy her mind. She pulled a makeup compact out of her pouch and pretended to check her hair as she looked behind her and up. She sighed when she saw Naruto standing on the roof with a set of binoculars pointed right at her.

"A little obvious, don'tcha think?" she whispered, thankful she was sitting in one of the back rows away from most of the other guests.

"Hey! I'm supposed to be obvious. You aren't, though, so be quiet."

She frowned at the reprimand and tilted the mirror so it reflected the sun directly into Naruto's eyes. '_I'm_ the one who gets onto him for stuff. Not the other way around.'

"OW! That was cheap," he pouted as he tried to blink away the spots in his vision. "Hey, bastard, how's your end?"

"Clear," was Sasuke's only response. Naruto snorted.

"Thanks, man. I can always count on you for interesting conversation."

"And what should I talk about? My nice view of the trees? The back of the house? I'm supposed to be watching for enemies, not entertaining you."

"Excellent point," Kakashi chimed in.

"I can't help it. I'm _bored_!" the blond complained. "And sitting in the sun is making me sleepy."

Sakura didn't have to see him to _know_ which expression was on Kakashi's masked face right then.

"Trade positions with Sasuke then."

"Hear that? The roof's yours, man."

"Fine. Just be quiet getting over here," Sasuke replied.

Sakura grinned faintly. Her teammates were keeping _her_ entertained a little at least.

* * *

Half-way through the reception, though, Sakura found herself wishing Naruto's communicator would just quit working. Apparently, the change of scenery hadn't helped his boredom, and he'd decided that watching her was a lot more interesting. He was currently commenting on every male in her immediate vicinity.

"Too old. Too young. Too ugly. Too… oh wait. That one's not a guy." Sakura tried not to laugh, but dang, Naruto had a point about that woman looking rather manly.

And then it happened.

A young man, probably in his early twenties, approached her, offering his hand as he asked, "Would you like to dance?"

"No, Sakura-chan. Don't do it! He just wants to get into your panties!" the blond wailed in mock distress.

"I'd love to," she replied with a smile and let him lead her onto the dance floor. Sakura wasn't entirely sure _where_ Naruto was on the grounds, but as soon as her companion turned his back to her, she glared angrily out the nearest window all the same.

Too bad she hadn't realized that was just the beginning.

"Oh, man. That hand's a little _low_, don'tcha think?" It was so very difficult _not_ to tell him to shut the hell up.

"Oh wait. My bad. Damn binoculars." She forced herself to smile to prevent herself from making any embarrassing facial expressions at her annoying teammate's commentary.

"Huh. Dude _must_ be gay, cause if that were me, I'd totally be…"

"Naruto!" Kakashi intervened once again, and Sakura almost sighed in relief. "I'm more interested in knowing how it is you're watching the grounds if you're busy watching Sakura."

"What the hell is that guy doing?" the blond mumbled, seemingly ignoring their team leader altogether.

"Naruto…" Kakashi warned.

"No, not _him_. Hold on a sec."

There was nothing but silence over the channel for several moments, and Sakura wished she could see what Naruto was doing from where she was. Luckily, the song had just ended, and she quickly excused herself, glancing around the hall and out the windows in search of her teammate.

"Naruto, report," she heard Kakashi say.

"Under control. Gimme a minute," he responded.

Sakura sighed and snuck off to the restroom where she could talk without giving herself away or people thinking she'd lost her mind and was talking to herself. It was just a few moments later when Naruto's voice crackled into her earpiece again.

"Ha ha. One attempt at sabotage foiled," the blond boasted to his teammates. "Some guy was in the kitchen about to piss in a tray of food. I left him with the guards. It was a good thing I was checking out what was going on inside, too, huh?"

There was no response from Kakashi or Sasuke. At least none they felt like sharing anyway.

"It's no assassination attempt, but I suppose that's a good thing."

"Ah, Sakura-chan. Were you worried about me?"

"Yeah, right. I was looking forward to finishing the mission without any more of your harassment actually," Sakura teased.

"Heh. It's only fair I get to pick on you a little after the way you were checking out the goods this morning."

Sakura gasped in disbelief, and it wasn't until Sasuke's flat comment of "I… really didn't need to know that" that she was able to shake herself out of her stupor.

"I did NOT!" she screamed in outrage.

"Jealous, Uchiha?" Naruto chuckled. No one heard Sasuke's indignant snort over Sakura's screeching.

"THERE'S NOTHING TO BE JEALOUS OF, BECAUSE I WAS NOT CHECKING OUT _ANYTHING_!" Sakura paled and glanced nervously out the bathroom door to see if anyone had just heard her outburst. When everyone seemed too caught up in their own business to notice her, she slumped against the doorframe in relief.

"Children," Kakashi calmly butted in, "If I hear anything irrelevant to the mission over the radio again, I will keep your portions of the pay for myself as compensation for putting up with the three of you."

The mumbled apologies of the teens was the last message sent until a few hours later when Kakashi announced that they were done for the evening.

* * *

"I'm telling you it's a bad idea, Sasuke. You're taking this too far." Naruto glanced out the window at Sakura who was sitting on the ground, watching the stars a short distance from the building.

"Whether you realize it or not, Sakura is a shinobi and a competent one at that. Yesterday should be proof enough that she's willing to keep going with the upped stakes."

"Yeah, but this is pushing it. The worst we've done so far was inappropriate. This is… kinda mean, man."

"Our first day as team seven, Kakshi-sensei made her think I was dying," Sasuke stated in a bored tone. "An enemy would do that and more."

Naruto didn't respond as he considered it. As much as he hated to admit it, his friend did have a point. What was more traumatizing? Seeing teammates broken and bloody on the battlefield or playing a little bit with one's head?

He nodded, ignoring the feeling that maybe he was just trying to justify what they were going to do.

* * *

Sakura was sitting in the grass as she stared up at the stars. She still had a few minutes left of her break before her patrol started, and she really didn't have anything to do. She'd already eaten, so she decided to enjoy the peace and quiet for bit. Nevermind that she'd have about four hours of nothing _but_ quiet to deal with soon. After a day of small talk and dancing with strangers, she was more than happy to get away from everything.

She heard footsteps behind her and was a bit surprised to see Sasuke when she glanced over her shoulder. He took a seat next to her and began to pick at the grass in front of him for a few moments before he spoke.

"I wanted to talk to you about the other day," he stated calmly in that smooth voice of his that seemed somewhat contradictory of his actions.

Sakura only nodded as she began to feel the weight of the situation. Sasuke wasn't one to beat around the bush. He came right out and said whatever needed to be said and was done with it, other people's feelings be damned. She could only wonder at what it was he could possibly need to speak to her about that would have him so… off.

"I… we went too far. It was unfair of us to put you in that situation. I'm sorry."

Truly she was surprised by the admission. Judging by the pained look on his face, it was obviously not easy for him to say. Not wanting to make him any more uncomfortable than he already was, though, she smiled, deciding to play it off like no big deal.

"It's okay really," she started with a shrug. "You play to win. Besides, it's not like my genjutsu wasn't just as bad," she chuckled, and he grinned.

"Yeah." Then his expression turned serious, and Sakura once again found herself wondering what was going on in his head.

"Is something else bothering you?" She didn't expect him to answer but was compelled to ask anyway. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned toward her.

"I realized something yesterday." He paused a moment and stared off in the distance.

Sakura couldn't figure out if he was just trying to find the right words or what the deal was. She might've found it cute had it not set her so ill at ease. Uchiha Sasuke, coolest boy in the academy and self-proclaimed avenger, was not in the habit of tripping over his words. But then again, she'd never really had a personal conversation – as this one was appearing it might be – with him. Tactics and jutsu, yes, but anything else was locked deep within a vault somewhere, off limits to, as far as she knew, _everyone_.

He took a deep breath and suddenly turned his gaze on her. "I didn't like the thought of you with another man."

Surely she was unable to hide the shock from that. Her eyes were wide, and her lips parted in wonder despite her brain's adamant demands that she keep her composure. It wasn't exactly a declaration of undying devotion, but it was a hell of a lot more than she'd ever expected to hear spill from his lips. Sakura could only stare.

'If I'd known that all it took to get him to notice me that way was to get him jealous, I'd have done it years ago,' she thought with a melancholy, little smile. 'What the hell am I supposed to say to something like that?' she wondered. Luckily, she didn't have to.

"I was hoping it wasn't too late to give us a shot." The slightly uncomfortable smile on his face was beautiful, she thought, as the corners of her own mouth curved up on their own accord. She unconsciously wet her lips as her mind spun a million thoughts all at once. Her response was automatic.

"I'd like that."

As soon as the words fell from her mouth, he was leaning in. His face was so close she could feel his breath on her. Softly, his lips brushed hers, and her stomach began to clench in excitement. Sakura might not have crushed on him as she did before, but there was still that part of her that cared for him a little more than just a teammate, that always reacted to just being near him.

The kiss quickly deepened as she found herself trying to release years of pent up emotion in only a few moments. Warmth began to spread through her as her mind finally latched onto the fact that 'Oh my god, I'm really kissing Sasuke-kun!' He smelled faintly of sweat and musk, a combination that normally sent her on a rampage about dirty boys needing a shower, but right then, it was causing potentially embarrassing things in her nether region. Or maybe it was just situation; she wasn't sure. All she knew was that her panties were getting very wet, and all he'd done was kiss her.

Sasuke leaned into her further, urging her to lie back onto the grass as he laid next to her and draped one leg over hers. He kissed her with the intensity she'd always seen in him, just never under these particular circumstances.

They broke apart breathless, but to her surprise, his lips weren't yet done with her. They trailed down her jaw and assaulted her neck. Her head tilted back, giving him better access as her eyes shut, allowing her to only focus on the sensations of Sasuke's mouth on the sensitive skin below her ear, his lean, muscular body pressed against hers, his hand slowly traveling up over the bottom of her ribcage. Her eyes shot open as her body tensed. This was not the time or the place for such things. They were making out on a client's front lawn!

"Sasuke-kun…" She went to nudge his face out of her neck, and when she glanced down, she saw bright, glaring orange. The hand on her breast squeezed as the face pulled away from her. Naruto got one last grope in before her fist connected with his jaw, knocking him clean across the clearing.

A kai revealed her teammates, standing in front of a nearby tree. Naruto looked extremely uncomfortable, while Sasuke looked smug.

"I believe that one puts us ahead," the dark-haired teen stated.

"Yeah, I guess it does," Sakura flatly replied as she stomped past them and continued toward the house.

"Sakura-chan," she heard Naruto call after her.

She stopped for a second, not bothering to turn toward them as she said, "Tell Kakashi-sensei I started my patrol when you see him." She then leapt up to the roof, not even waiting for a response.

Sakura somehow managed to keep the tears at bay. "Thank goodness for small favors," she grumbled as she half-heartedly scanned the grounds. "I should've _known_ it wasn't real! I can be so _stupid_ sometimes."

She had to admit, though, she'd never expected the bet to go this far, especially considering how silly the terms were. She remembered taunting them about their weak genjutsu skills. She had even gone so far as to say that the two of them _together_ couldn't beat her.

"You're on!" they had both exclaimed.

"Alright, losers must ask out a person of the winner's choice."

"Fair enough. Besides, thick-brows needs a date pretty bad." Naruto had proclaimed, doing his own rendition of the nice guy pose which really looked anything but. Sasuke had smirked at the look of horror on her face, and it had taken her a moment to think of someone who'd invoke an equal amount of nausea in her teammates.

"Well, he's just going to be dateless for a while, because Anko's going to have two new admirers." The guys had cringed at that one, and Sakura knew it was out of fear that she'd quite probably accept. Anko was, after all, notorious for being the number one female pervert in the village as well as having a few questionable fetishes. Truth be told, most men in the village were a bit scared of her despite her small stature and good looks. There'd been several rumors about a certain bondage swing-type thing the woman supposedly owned.

"It's a bet, then," Sasuke commented as he extended his hand. Sakura smirked as she took it, thinking there was no way in hell these two could best her.

But as she admitted before, Sasuke plays to win.

"Well, so do I," she growled, determined to come up with her next (and hopefully last) genjutsu before her shift was over.

* * *

_TBC_


	5. All's Fair In Love And War

**A/N**: I apologize for the wait. Hopefully, it'll be worth it! And many thank yous to Sinari for the beta.  
**Warnings**: Yaoi! though nothing graphic  
**Pairings this chapter**: SasuNaru/NaruSasu  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters, although I absolutely ADORE Inner Sakura. 3

**The Sweetest Victory  
Chapter 5: All's Fair in Love and War**

* * *

She had always dreamed vividly. How could she not when Inner Sakura ruled her nocturnal world with her typical 'take no prisoners' attitude unchecked? And while Sakura may not always remember her dreams after waking, the ones she did were indeed their own form of therapy.

Which was why she was utterly pissed when she was pulled from the wonderful depths of her subconscious where her asshole teammates had been tied up with chakra strands and were about to be beaten senseless.

_I had **just** gotten to the spankings, damn it!_ Inner Sakura seethed. She'd really been looking forward to hearing the sweet, popping sounds of their overly-inflated male egos bursting. Her fury only intensified when she opened her eyes to find Naruto hovering over her, his expression uncomfortable as he lightly shook her shoulder.

"Sakura-chan?"

Her reaction was immediate.

Sakura wasn't sure whether it was from the left-over hostility from her dream or the simple fact that she wasn't ready to be woken up, but either way, her fist still ended up in Naruto's face all the same.

"Ow! Next time I'll just throw something at you from across the room when we're about to leave," the blond grumbled as his hand covered his left eye.

"At least I didn't pull a kunai on you." Ignoring the look of shocked hurt on her teammate's face, Sakura quickly slipped past him and into the adjoining bathroom.

With a sigh, she turned on the faucet and began washing her face. The coolness was soothing, and with each splash, she felt a tiny bit of her irritation rinse away. 'That was unfair of me,' Sakura thought as she grabbed the towel off the rack behind her and pressed her face into it. "Ugh. What's _really_ unfair is that _I_ feel guilty about that even after what they pulled last night," she grumbled. Stupid boys. They probably had a nice laugh about it afterwards.

Dejectedly, Sakura tossed the towel back on the rack and began brushing her teeth hard enough to make her gums bleed. The sound of the door to their room opening and closing caught her attention as she spit a mouthful of pink foam into the sink.

"She punched you?" It was Sasuke; he sounded vaguely amused.

"Yeah," Naruto sighed, and then in a hushed tone added, "If I didn't know different, I'd say she was raggin' again."

She gaped for a moment and quickly took back all the apologies she wasn't going to tell him.

"And how would you know when I _am_, Na-ru-to?!" she snapped, pointing her toothbrush accusingly at the door leading back to their room.

"Er…" Somebody mumbled something, but she didn't even really care that she couldn't hear it. Mortification over what she'd just screamed along with the confirmation that yes, they _were_ aware of her cycles was slowly creeping over her.

"Damn it!" she growled quietly to herself as she attempted to shove Inner Sakura down and gag her. "Get ahold of yourself." Subject matter aside – because she just wasn't even going to touch _that_ right then – biting everyone's heads off was not the way she'd wanted to start off her morning. Yes, she was pissed, but they didn't really need to know _how_ upset she was.

Taking another deep breath to compose herself, Sakura rinsed her mouth out and quickly gathered her things. By the time she strode back into the room to put her toiletries in her bag, her calm mask was back in place. With her back to her teammates, Sakura went to work gathering her bedroll and making sure she'd left nothing else in the room.

The silence between the three of them was deafening.

It wasn't until after her stuff was packed and she'd sat down to begin fastening her shin guards that anyone dared to say anything.

"Sakura-chan?"

Her only response was a soft "Hmm," as she continued onto the next buckle without looking up.

"Um, well, are you…? I mean, about yesterday, I…" Naruto began but couldn't seem to find the best way to say it. A snort from Sasuke interrupted him anyway.

Her eye twitched as Inner Sakura quickly clawed her way out of her box once again shaking her fist wildly and screaming, _Oh, no, he didn't! _Typical reaction or not, he really needed to learn when to keep his thoughts to himself. She turned to face her teammates then, intent on giving them a verbal lashing they'd never forget, but karma was against her yet again as Kakashi chose that particular moment to waltz into the room.

"So," he began in that falsely-cheerful tone they'd grown so accustomed to over the years, "Everyone ready?"

"Definitely," Sakura growled, snatching her bag up off the floor and storming out the door.

* * *

Naruto was watching her again, she realized as the group headed back to Konoha. It was different from their previous genjutsu where afterwards he'd been amusedly sneaking peeks at her every time Kakashi was near them. No, this time she could practically taste the worry radiating off of him. 

_Good_, Inner Sakura growled. _He__should be worried_.

Sasuke wasn't. The only times he'd bothered to spare her a glance was when he pointed out just how far behind she'd fallen.

'Of course,' she thought as she rolled her eyes. But oddly enough, for once she was actually kind of glad. Sakura was already pissed at both of them; having someone like _Sasuke_ pity her on top of that would only make it that much worse.

'I can't believe I'm actually grateful he can be a heartless bastard.' But the more she thought about it, the more she felt it was better this way. Naruto's attack of conscience was already annoying enough. And yes, she was rational enough to realize how irrational that was, but she didn't care. She was tired and cranky and wanted nothing more at that moment than to curl up somewhere and sleep like the dead.

Sakura glanced down at her shadow as she trudged along the path. They'd been traveling a while; the early morning sun that had been on their backs when they'd left was now directly overhead. Sadly, they still had a long way to go, and she was already exhausted, she realized as she fought to not fall too far behind, yawning all the while. Damn, she was so freaking tired!

"Of all the nights for me to not be able to sleep," she grumbled. It wasn't for lack of wanting, of course, but when finishing guard duty found her in closed quarters with her teammates after what they'd done, agitation had been the only thing to come easily to her. She'd spent a good couple of hours glaring at the ceiling, Sasuke's (admittedly delicious) back, and Naruto's drooling, perfectly content face.

Sakura frowned at the growing gap between herself and the rest of the team and tried to pick up the pace once again. Her frown only deepened when Naruto took notice and declared loudly to anyone listening that he would imminently die of starvation if they didn't break soon.

She wasn't about to protest stopping for a while, though.

They found a nice shaded area a little further north, and Sakura dropped heavily beneath the nearest tree without even removing her pack. If she leaned her head just so, she might be able to catch a short nap.

She realized she would have no such luck when her ears picked up the sound of approaching footsteps followed by Naruto's distinct voice asking, "So, is this chunk of rotten log taken?"

She cracked an eye open to glare at her teammate. Unfortunately, she didn't look half as intimidating as she'd wanted to and blamed that on exhaustion instead of the fact that he was grinning in that way that tended to disarm people. Sakura made a mental note to kill whoever had taught him that.

"If you don't mind sharing with the termites and possibly a snake or two," she sighed

"Ha! As if some bugs could defeat the great Uzumaki Naruto," he laughed as he sat down across from her and started digging through his stuff.

"Shino would take offense to that," she dryly responded.

"Yeah, well, he's not here, is he?" He flashed her a grin before taking a large bite from a muffin he'd pulled from his pack. She only raised an eyebrow. "Tell ya what. Can I buy your silence with one of these?" he asked, holding up his snack as he attempted to wave it enticingly in front of her. "Cause between you and me, his bugs are kinda creepy."

She didn't resist the urge to roll her eyes. "A half-eaten muffin? No thanks."

Naruto chuckled as he pulled a fresh one from his bag and tossed it to her. Sakura caught it easily and glanced over at her teammate. It smelled good, and she noticed for the first time how hungry she actually was.

"How many of these do you have in there?" Sakura asked. "My silence might not be so easily bought."

When he smiled widely, she knew the answer before he had the chance to speak.

"Well, I stopped by the kitchen on the way out and a whole tray _might've_ found its way into my bag."

Sakura laughed despite herself. "I'm starting to think you're a kleptomaniac on top of being an alcoholic, loudmouthed pervert."

"Oh, kinky," he replied.

Sakura shook her head and bit into her muffin.

Silence lingered between them as they ate. She had no real interest in making small talk even if she was too tired to really be utterly pissed at him at that moment. It was odd for Naruto to be so quiet, though, she realized a few minutes later. Glancing up from the interesting spot just in front of his feet, Sakura saw that his smile was gone. He was leaning forward, elbows resting on his knees, as he looked back at her with that same expression he'd worn half the morning.

"I'm sorry," he finally said after a long pause.

And just like that, the tentatively stable ground between them was gone once again.

Sakura looked down and absently brushed the crumbs off her shirt before nodding and pushing herself up from the ground. She took all of two steps before Naruto appeared directly in front of her and grabbed her by the shoulders, his head hunched down so he could look her in the eyes.

"I mean it, Sakura-chan. We went too far."

The only thought running through her head right then was, 'he's too close.' Her skin crawled with the need to put some distance between them. They hadn't been in such close proximity since yesterday morning when he'd shoved her against the wall of their room, and so much had happened since then. Feelings and images from the genjutsu quickly flashed in her memory. His hands large and heavy on her shoulders – in her mind at least, they'd felt her up the night before. Smells – some similar, some different – that had been so intriguing when she'd only associated them with Sasuke invaded her senses once again.

His lips – she could still remember the feel of them on her neck – were moving again, but damned if she heard what he was saying. Lost in thought, Sakura distractedly watched his mouth shift and curve to form the sounds, the quick glimpses of teeth and tongue, and briefly wondered if kissing him would be anything like kissing Sasuke.

As soon as that idea danced through her thoughts, Sakura's eyes widened, and she pulled away from him like she'd been burned.

"Sakura-chan?"

'I never kissed Sasuke!' she vehemently reminded the traitorous part of her brain that apparently was out to get her. This was ridiculous. It was just like with Kakashi. She took another step back and readjusted the straps of her backpack, her face set in a scowl. 'I just need some distance. Then everything will be back to normal, and I can forget this ever happened.'

"You okay?" Naruto's expression was worried and apologetic all at once, and when it immediately reminded Sakura of the _incident_ the morning before, she found she couldn't stand to look at him. She'd be happy to never see that expression on his face again.

"Fine," she ground out through clenched teeth as she brushed past him, reassuring herself once more that a little time and distance would fix it all, and marched back onto the trail that led home. "Are we going or what?"

No one argued with her, and for that she was grateful.

The rest of the journey was spent in near-silence on Sakura's part. Naruto would occasionally comment on this or that. Things like, "That tree looks like the old hag's face," "Heh, did you see those two deer back there?" and "Yeah, Ero-sennin dragged me there once when he was drunk." It was a brothel, and the very disturbing mental images that statement conjured made Sakura realize she was better off ignoring him completely.

Sasuke was… well, Sasuke: quiet, cool, and undeniably _hot_. Her eyes trailed over him as she slowly took in the outline of muscle visible through the fabric of his clothes with each movement. Occasionally a gust of wind would pull the material taut and cause her pulse to quicken and her mouth to go dry.

'It's not fair,' Sakura mentally sighed, torn between wanting to just be near him and wanting to punch him in the face.

Over the years, she'd managed to convince herself that she was fine with just being a friend and teammate to Sasuke. She'd even somewhat convinced herself that her feelings were simply that of a childhood infatuation. After last night, though, it was obvious the very carefully pieced together wall of denial had begun to crumble.

It hurt to think about it, really. She'd dreamt of being in that situation for years, and for a few brief moments, it had been bliss. Was there truly no place Sasuke wouldn't go to win?

It wasn't until she noticed his eyes cut over to her that Sakura realized she was still staring at him. He didn't comment, of course, but out of no small parts embarrassment and irritation, she felt the need to justify her intentions anyway.

Unfortunately, "You have something on your face," was the only thing she could think of right then. _Holy crap, that was lame!_ Inner Sakura complained just as soon as she said it.

Sasuke gave her a skeptical look but didn't say anything, just turned his attention back to the path they were traveling. After mentally kicking herself a few times, Sakura blamed that too on her teammates' back-handed genjutsu.

She frowned and kicked a rock. _Why_ did they have to do that? Things had finally grown comfortable between them. Sasuke's return had surprisingly been just as hard as his unexpected departure – old wounds had been torn open, bled dry, and had eventually healed even if they still itched from time to time – but now, everything was weird, their roles jumbled and lines blurred. Well, on her end at least.

Sakura wanted more than anything for things to go back to the way they were, where she wasn't pining after Sasuke, where she wasn't wondering if Naruto's mouth was good for things other than talking, where she didn't see the infuriatingly interesting sight of Naruto with a hard-on every fucking time she looked at the idiot, where she could talk to their team leader and not remember tracing his abs with her tongue as she went further down…

"Ugh! I _hate_ you both right now," she grumbled under her breath. A few days ago, things had been normal, and now, she couldn't think of anything sweeter than the two of them getting a taste of their own medicine.

* * *

Naruto belched loudly and set his second empty bowl down on the bar. It was great to be home if for no other reason than eating at Ichiraku's. No one could make a bowl of ramen like the old man. It was a simple fact. 

After he and Sasuke had parted ways at the village gates – the jerk _still_ wouldn't admit that Naruto was the reason their mission had been a success – he'd wasted no time getting over here. He glanced at the empty bowls stacked on top of one another and briefly considered ordering a third. 'Nah, I'll swing by in the morning for breakfast instead,' he decided.

"See ya tomorrow," Naruto informed the owner as he paid for his meal. Nothing could ruin this evening; he was sure of it. He was home, had a stomach stuffed full of his favorite food, and Sakura-chan had been smiling as she walked through the gates – that alone had been a huge weight off his shoulders. All was right with the world, he decided as he brushed the curtain aside and stepped out onto the dirt road.

And that was when he saw Sasuke walking toward him with a bag of groceries dangling from one arm.

His cheerful expression almost faltered, but Naruto quickly recovered, reminding himself that nothing could get rid of his contented smile right then, not even his damn-near constantly grouchy teammate. He had the overwhelming urge to tell him as much, so he quickly fell in step with the Uchiha as he passed the ramen stand.

"You can argue with me all you want, but you won't ruin my night," Naruto boasted, hands behind his head and grin on his face.

Sasuke gave him a sideways glance and shook his head. "You're the one who wanted to argue earlier."

His tone was still carefree as he laughed, "No way, man. You totally started it."

"…And you're doing it again," Sasuke pointed out with a smirk.

Naruto opened his mouth to respond but quickly shut it when he realized what he'd been about to say. Changing tactics, he simply replied, "I'm gonna ignore that."

He then turned his gaze up to the clear night sky and noted the crescent moon was no longer low on the horizon. It was nice out - still warm enough to be comfortable but no longer muggy; a light breeze lazed its way down the street with them, which only seemed to reinforce Naruto's mood, and a comfortable silence accompanied them a few blocks before it was broken again.

"Come over." Sasuke didn't ask. He never did, not that it really irritated Naruto. He was well versed in Sasuke-speak by now. He simply rolled his eyes and chuckled at the request.

"One of these days, you're gonna have to learn to ask, man. What if I have a hot date or something?"

Sasuke snorted. "I'm as close to a hot date as you get, moron."

"Well, aren't we pathetic then? All we ever do is drink or fight or drink _and_ fight. And you never put out. It's quite sad," he laughed as they continued their slow pace through the business district. When he noticed Sasuke wasn't laughing with him, he glanced over at his friend. Usually comments like that at least earned him a disgusted snort. The expression on Sasuke's face was contemplative, and Naruto didn't know what to think. "Um?"

"And what if I did?" The question was quiet as Sasuke's eyes stayed fixed intently on the path in front of him.

Naruto blinked and almost lost his balance when his foot found a pothole. Did he just…? Nah. No way. He had to have heard wrong. Or it was a joke, the blond concluded. Sadly, Sasuke pulling his leg was about as likely as Sasuke coming onto him, though.

Something was off. Maybe he didn't hear all of it. Sasuke had been speaking rather softly after all. Yeah, that had to be it. "What if you did what?"

Frowning, Sasuke turned toward him, tension apparent in the tightly clenched muscles of his jaw. "Don't make me repeat myself," he warned.

"Look, I don't have a clue what you're talking about, so you're gonna have to repeat it," Naruto growled back, his aggravation getting the best of him.

Across from him, Sasuke's frown deepened, and Naruto couldn't help but mirror the sentiment. What the fuck was going on? Suddenly Sasuke closed the gap between them, going well beyond the Uchicha's preferred boundaries of personal space.

"You don't know what I'm talking about?" he asked skeptically. "You sure?" He leaned in closer, touching his chest to Naruto's as he spoke directly in his ear. "I don't think you're really so stupid that you'd miss an offer when it's made, Dead Last."

As Naruto sat, fighting the urge to shiver at the sensation of warm breath ghosting against his ear, the large hand hovering just over his ass as if it wanted to grab but thought better of it verified what his mind was beginning to suspect. He'd heard right all along. Holy shit! Uchiha Sasuke, asshole extraordinaire, was coming onto him!

"Y…you're serious?!"

"Ask again, and I'll take it back," he growled and, seeming to notice they were still in the middle of the street, stepped back and glared menacingly at Naruto. The blond only nodded mutely in response.

His first impulse was to do something to make the Uchiha revoke the offer and laugh it off as his usual idiocy. This was Sasuke after all, and while the idea of seeing his stuck up teammate cut loose for once was tempting, this wasn't exactly the way he'd always imagined it would finally happen.

But at the same time, Naruto couldn't quite bring himself to walk away, and the only reason he could fathom was simply that it was Sasuke. _Sasuke_ wanted to… with him?!

Naruto wasn't as ignorant in the way of sex as his female teammate believed. One didn't spend three years 'information gathering' with Jiraiya and not learn a thing or twenty, but his previous experiences all had one important similarity (well, two if you count the fact that none of them had really known him): they'd all been female.

And yet, here he was. Sasuke, _Uchiha__Sasuke,_ his teammate, his rival, the friend who'd almost killed him, the lucky bastard who could make any girl instantly wet her panties just by looking at her wanted in his pants?! It was surreal, flattering, and quite honestly a little fucking _weird_.

In fact, Naruto realized now that he thought about it, it was too good to be true. His eyes widened as understanding slapped him in the face.

Sakura-chan.

He had no real proof – Sasuke had very much talked and behaved like Sasuke after all – just a gut feeling. This person standing in front of him waiting for some sort of response wasn't real, _couldn't_ be real.

"Hey, bastard, what makes you think I'll accept?"

Sasuke smirked at that. "Better than nothing, right?"

That was all the reassurance Naruto needed as his hands formed the seal for a kai. When he was alone a moment later, he wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed.

He shook his head to clear it of that thought. "I need to find Sasuke."

Leaping up onto the roof of the pastry shop behind him, Naruto glanced around.

"He's probably not that way," he said to himself, looking in the direction he'd been walking. "She wouldn't lead me right to him if I'm supposed to think I'm already with him. That leaves… everywhere else. Damn, he could be at home right now for all I know!" he sighed.

He then turned the opposite direction. "Hell, it would probably just be easier to find Sakura-chan and make sure she's not after Sasuke. She's bound to be nearby."

He leapt from roof to roof back toward the place where, as far as he knew at least, the genjutsu had started. Naruto landed on the roof of Ichiraku and didn't bother trying to hide himself. If she didn't take off the minute he broke the genjutsu, she most likely knew what he was doing, but that also meant she had to be close. A quick scan over the immediately surrounding buildings turned up nothing.

"Damn it! Where is she?"

He dropped down to the ground and started down the street, looking down each cross street he passed. When several blocks turned up nothing more than a few irritated villagers, a couple of stray cats, and a rather fragrant drunk leaning heavily against the building he'd just vomited on, Naruto growled in frustration.

"I'm not gonna find either of them at this rate."

Up ahead, the street abruptly turned left with only a small alley veering off to the right. He paused long enough to glance down the alley, and Naruto practically sagged in relief when he did. There was Sasuke leaning against the side of a resale shop. Sighing, Naruto shook his head and started to close the distance between them.

"All that stress over nothing," he chuckled. When his eyes began to take in the condition of his teammate, though, he stopped dead in his tracks, unable to believe what he was seeing. Sasuke's eyes were squeezed tightly shut, his face twisted into a grimace, and as Naruto's gaze slid over the rest of him, it was hard to miss the fact that Sasuke was obviously aroused.

Oh, _shit_!

His eyes scoured the roof of the resale shop to his left and the restaurant on his right, and then the neighboring buildings with no luck, but when he looked a little further down the alley, though, he finally spotted a shock of pink on a third story fire escape. She was sitting half-shrouded in darkness; had it not been for a nearby streetlamp, he might not have ever found her, he realized. Not surprisingly, Sakura was sitting with her back against the brickwork, hands clasped in a seal he couldn't make out at that distance but could easily guess which one it was.

Naruto turned his attention back to Sasuke and began walking toward him, intent on snapping him out of the genjutsu even if it meant beating his ass right there in the alley.

He tried not to. Really he did, but it was damn near impossible to keep his eyes off the erection straining against his teammate's pants. Yes, Uchiha Sasuke, it seemed, was human after all. Who knew? The thought almost made Naruto laugh. Okay, yeah, he'd seen him sneak peeks at Sakura-chan's legs when he'd first returned to the village, but who wouldn't? Hell, he's seen other kunoichi eye her legs before, and while he realized the shin guards naturally just drew a person's attention, his fantasies would never allow him to believe anything less than them sexing her up with their eyes, of course. Many a night had been spent with visions of Anko or Ino (sometimes both) restraining and teasing his pink-haired teammate.

But then the sound of Sasuke _(Sasuke!) _moaning pulled his thoughts back to the teammate in question, though, and Naruto couldn't help but wonder what was going on in that genjutsu. Was Sakura-chan seducing him? A pang of jealousy hit him square in the gut at the thought, but turnabout was fair play, he supposed. If anyone deserved to be brought up and left hanging, it was Sasuke. But damn, he was gonna be pissy afterward, because whatever it was, Sasuke seemed to be enjoying it quite a bit! He paused, a good twenty feet still between them, as Naruto wondered if he should break the genjutsu or just let it run its course. Did he really want to be the cause of _that _sort of frustration? Not particularly.

"_Uhn_, just get on with it, Dead Last!"

Naruto blinked once, then twice before the full implication of that statement sunk in.

'EH?! _Me?!'_ Somewhere in the back of his brain, the tiny part that was running on auto-pilot, Naruto realized his jaw was hanging open, but the rest of it had temporarily shut down. He stared, wide-eyed and more than a little surprised – fucking shocked was more like it – as his teammate's hips began to move. It was subtle, only a faint rocking motion, but it was there. Naruto found himself strangely fascinated.

But when Sasuke's hands came up to grasp… something (hair maybe?), Naruto quickly looked away.

'That bastard! I can't believe he finds nothing strange about that! If anyone should be on his knees, it's him!' He ran his hand through his hair in irritation. 'And Sakura-chan!' his mind screamed as he turned his gaze back on her. 'Why would she do that? Why would she think we…'

Naruto trailed off from his mental rant when he noticed she was looking at him. Sakura's arms were lax at her sides, her face no longer the epitome of concentration. 'She quit the jutsu,' he realized. A moment passed as they stared at each other, her expression blank and his questioning before he watched her turn away and leap down off the balcony.

As soon as her feet hit the ground, his eyes were back on Sasuke who was no longer leaning against the building, body taut with a type of tension Naruto never expected to witness personally. No, Sasuke's fists were clenched, his back ram-rod straight and expression guarded as his eyes jumped from Sakura to Naruto and then away from them both.

Naruto could do little more than sigh and wonder just how ugly things were about to get.

* * *

_TBC_


	6. Libra: A Natural Born Diplomat?

**A/N**: Err, don't hate me? sheepish Cockkage-sama is the intellectual property of the wonderful and awesome Myrafur and was borrowed with her blessings. PLZ TO NOT BE COMING AT ME WITH PITCHFORKS THNX. :P

**Warnings**: awkwardness, discussions of sexuality

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters as it is the property of Masashi Kishimoto. I do, however, think team seven needs to just jump each other and get it over with. :3

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 6: Libra: A Natural Born Diplomat?**

* * *

As the three of them stood in the alley, awkwardly shifting their gazes amongst themselves, Naruto couldn't decide what he thought of the situation. No one had spoken yet, and he was mildly disappointed there was no sudden gust of wind blowing fallen leaves between them - for dramatic effect - as they each waited for someone else to break the uncomfortable silence.

Sakura looked more tired than anything, but he didn't miss the way she nervously chewed her bottom lip. Naruto could only imagine what she was thinking right then. He didn't think she was doing an inner victory dance or anything, since that cute, little smirk she gets when she shows him up was absent.

To Sasuke's credit, he hadn't taken off yet. Naruto wasn't too sure he'd be able to do the same if their positions had been switched. Well, except for the fact that he lacked the uptightness his teammate possessed and that none of this would even be an issue if he'd been the one caught in the jutsu. There would probably have been some eye rolling and name calling, and then everything would've gone back to business as usual. He'd be a little offended if he really had the time to think about it.

But there Sasuke stood, even if he looked a bit like a caged animal. 'At least he's not sporting wood anymore,' Naruto thought morbidly.

"Okay," he blurted out, effectively cutting through the tense silence and drawing the attention of his teammates. His voice echoed loudly in the dark alley, and Naruto winced before continuing in a much lower volume. "Err, great job, Sakura-chan. You sure showed us! Come on, Sasuke. I'll buy you a drink….. Or twelve," he added under his breath as he tried to usher his friend out of the alley.

"Get _off_!" Sasuke demanded as he jerked his arm out of Naruto's grasp. "I'm not done here yet."

He sighed and considered reminding his friend that now wasn't the time to flip out - it was time to fall back, regroup, strategize, and … some other bullshit they'd learned in the academy about losing battles; he was sure Sasuke remembered it. He'd just drag it out of him, and then they'd come up with a plan.

But Sasuke's harsh reply seemed to have snapped Sakura out of any awkwardness she might've been feeling. Her expression quickly shifted to one Naruto was much more used to seeing aimed toward himself – the one that said she was clearly unimpressed.

"I don't see how _I _could help you with that," she said flatly.

Naruto blinked once, twice, then promptly slapped himself in the forehead, because seriously, she did _not _just go there.

Apparently, Sasuke decided to ignore the remark altogether. He crossed his arms over his chest and simply stated, "We're still ahead, you know."

"Like hell!" she yelled, eyes ablaze.

"_And,_" he added before she could keep going. "It's our turn next."

"You wanna continue? Fine! And since neither of you seemed too upset by this one, I guess I'll have to get serious!"

Naruto could only watch in disbelief as his teammates argued. Serious disbelief. Sakura-chan was yelling - _yelling!_ - at Sasuke and being just as stubborn, too! It made him wonder if that genjutsu she cast on him had really sent him to an alternate dimension where Sasuke really wanted to sex him up and Sakura allowed her ego to get in the way of her common sense.

He quickly performed another kai just to be sure.

When it had no effect, he grimaced. Sakura was _way _too upset all of a sudden to simply shake hands and call a truce, and Sasuke... Well, Naruto wondered if Sasuke even knew what a truce _was_. If things continued like this… Immediately, his mind conjured an image of burning buildings, busted roads, and suspension of duty for the three of them.

Naruto groaned. This had to end now, and he could only think of one way. Making the decision, Naruto interrupted them.

"Uh, guys? _Guys_!" They glared at each other for two long seconds but were thankfully quiet. When they finally turned their attention on him, he continued. "I quit," he said simply. "This has gone way too far."

"Fine," Sasuke scoffed. "You just hold me back anyway."

"That's bullshit, and you know it!" Naruto snorted and turned his eyes on Sakura. She was staring at him in shock, and he found himself rather annoyed by that. He could be rational, damn it!

She met his gaze for a few seconds before glancing back at Sasuke. Then suddenly, her rigid stance sagged as she sighed, "Okay, you win. I quit."

Apparently, it wasn't the response Sasuke was expecting.

"What?! You can't quit!"

"Sure I can," she shrugged. "Tomorrow I'll go ask Lee out to dinner or whatever."

Sasuke fumed, his tightly clenched jaw muscles standing out in hard contrast to the rest of his face. "Maybe you should take Dead Last instead - since you're both such cowards and all," he sneered.

Naruto opened his mouth to deny the accusation – being tired of being at odds with their teammate was not the same thing as being scared! – but Sakura suddenly appeared at Naruto's side and looped her arm with his. She looked utterly pissed.

"If that's what you want, Sasuke, we'll go on a date. And you know what? It'll be fun!"

Sasuke turned and disappeared in a flurry of leaves, but not before Naruto saw the look of disgust on his face. And judging by Sakura's expression, she'd seen it as well.

The blond exhaled loudly, and, running a hand through his hair, he glanced down at the girl still on his arm. Sakura was staring, apparently lost in thought or surprise or… _something_, at the place where Sasuke had just been standing.

"Err, Sakura-chan?" He lightly nudged her side with his elbow as he said it and saw a pained expression quickly pass over her face as she disentangled her arm from his.

"How about tomorrow, 'kay? I'm tired."

It was an obvious brush-off, but Naruto could've cared less considering he wasn't even asking about the date. To be honest, he wasn't in the mood to deal with _either_ of them anymore that night.

"Tomorrow then."

Sakura nodded and gave him a weak smile before disappearing herself.

Naruto sighed, finding himself alone in the alleyway, and with the odd mixture of lingering irritation and growing relief, he started toward his apartment.

* * *

Naruto awoke the following day to _incessant_ knocking of the _most_ annoying kind. Grumbling, he rolled out of bed and had to dig through the mess of tangled sheets, clothes, and pillows on the floor until he found the pajama pants he'd kicked off during the night. And yeah, if he hadn't kept flopping around unable to sleep they wouldn't have kept bunching and twisting uncomfortably in the first place, but that was beside the point.

The person at the door knocked again and louder than before.

"Hang on, damn it! I'm comin'," he barked, hopping on one leg across the living room as he shoved the other into his pants. As soon as they were on, he answered the door and was surprised to discover an uncomfortable looking Sakura on his doorstep. Glancing out at the street, he noticed for the first time that it wasn't morning anymore.

"Um, we never decided on a time last night, so…"

"Eh?" His mind groped blindly for an explanation for a few moments until realization dawned on him. "_Oh_! Right." Their date – and boy did that sound weird in his head! "Uh, what time is it?" he asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"2:30," Sakura offered, still looking like she'd rather be anywhere but there. She was pointedly _not_ looking at him, and, having a bizarre sense of déjà vu, he quickly glanced down at himself to confirm that yes, Cockkage-sama had taken the morning off from embarrassing him. He was decent, damn it! Naruto scratched the back of his head, having no idea what her problem was this time. If anything, _he_ should be the one feeling awkward after last night, he thought, mildly irritated, but there she was, chewing her lip and looking absolutely miserable.

"I didn't realize you'd still be sleeping. Just pick me up later whenever you're ready, okay?" she said and began moving toward the steps.

"Hold up. We can go ahead and go now if ya want," he offered. "Just lemme get dressed first." Naruto saw her warily glance at his bare chest before meeting his gaze. "Come on. You can watch tv or something. I'll be quick."

Sakura stood there a moment before finally nodding and following him inside. He didn't offer her a drink or wait for her to take a seat on his beat up, old couch before slipping into the bedroom. She knew where everything was in his apartment already, and now that he was waking up, his own discomfort was beginning to make itself known.

Sniffing an underarm, Naruto quickly gathered some clean clothes and headed into the bathroom. As he slipped under the hot spray of the shower and began lathering himself up, he couldn't stop his mind from dwelling on what was about to happen. He was _finally_ going on a date with Sakura-chan. He should've been _happy_. He should've been planning all the witty things he was going to say. He should've been jerking off to the very _idea_ of it, but it was kind of hard to will his favorite mental images of Sakura - wearing nothing but her shoes and shin guards - after she... well, after last night anyway.

Not to mention the fact that going out with him was her punishment for losing. Naruto made a mental note to punch Sasuke in the face for that, because _damn_. He scrubbed himself harder as he grew more and more annoyed with the way things had turned out.

His pits had never been cleaner.

When he stepped into his living room dressed and wet-headed a few minutes later, he found Sakura standing in the corner, poking at one of his plants.

"This one new?" she asked without looking up.

"Nah, it used to be out on the balcony," he answered distractedly. "Err, so…." Sakura finally turned away from the plant and glanced up at him, and Naruto couldn't think of any way to finish that sentence so he didn't.

Awkward silence followed, and Naruto _hated_ it. Ever since his early days at the academy he'd wanted to talk to her, befriend her (and hoped for more eventually) and he'd done better than he ever really expected. She truly was one of his best friends, and the idea that things were uncomfortable between them made his stomach turn. He and Sakura had never had trouble communicating since they'd been put on team seven together, and there was just something inherently _wrong_ about it being that way now.

So Naruto did what he did best: put on a smile and joked about the situation.

"Guess we're even now, huh?" He wasn't sure, but he thought her shoulders seemed to relax just a bit.

"No," she answered a moment later. "You still have to pay for our date."

"Oh, we're going to Ichiraku then? Great!" he grinned, pulling out his trusty frog wallet to check his funds.

"Hey!" she protested but was half-smiling, and Naruto couldn't help but smile also. Maybe this wouldn't be as bad as he'd imagined after all.

It was, in fact, just short of being a total disaster, he decided. The awkward silence returned just as soon as they made it out of his apartment and Naruto realized they had nothing to talk about that didn't involve their team, training, or the last subject he wanted to talk about right then: Sasuke.

Hmm, what _could_ they talk about? Luckily, he didn't have to figure it out as a distraction made its appearance in the form of a blonde best friend.

"Hey, Forehead, if you don't come see me more, I'm going to start thinking I've been replaced." Everything about her radiated annoyance, from the tone of her voice and the hand clutching the bag of takeout to her other hand tapping impatiently at her hip. Everything but the smirk and wink she threw his way, that is.

"I know, Pig. I've just been busy lately." Sakura didn't seem to notice as her response to Ino was just as distracted as everything else so far that day.

Ino was staring; that probably wasn't a good thing.

"Okay, what's going on?" she asked a moment later, grinning like a cat. "You two didn't accidentally see each other naked or something did you?" She was enjoying this way too much.

Ha, if only!

"Ino!" Sakura growled. "Don't you have someone else to torture?"

"Yeah, yeah. You two are no fun anyway," she answered with a flippant wave of hand as she turned to leave. She then added over her shoulder, "Loosen up or people are going to think you're on an extremely awkward first date or something."

When complete silence greeted that comment, Ino whipped around in shock. And holy crap, he'd never seen such a crazed look on her face before!

"Oh, _please_ tell me that's it!" She was practically salivating. It was quite disturbing.

"Well…" "Not really," Sakura and Naruto answered in unison before glancing at each other in surprise.

"No." "Sorta," they quickly amended.

Ino glanced from her to him and back again. "Right," she began slowly. "Well, I'll see you later. Need to get this back to the shop 'n all." She gestured toward her bag. "Details, Forehead, once you figure out what the hell's going on, and I won't take no for an answer." And with that, Ino left them to their own discomfort.

'Hmph, some friend she was, and wow, Sakura was really gonna tell her we're on a _date_?' At that realization, Naruto turned toward her only to catch the pained look on his teammate's face.

"Sakura-chan?"

"Let's just go," she quickly ground out as she began walking again. He could tell she was mad; four years of friendship had taught him that much. Unfortunately, he wasn't sure _why_. Naruto made a mental note to have a kage bunshin kick his own ass if it turned out to be his fault, though.

No more than two words were spoken during the rest of the walk to the ramen stand. Most of it was spent with Naruto's hands shoved grumpily in his pockets and Sakura staring at her feet or the shops on the side of the street opposite him.

It wasn't much better once they were sitting down with two big, steaming bowls of ramen in front of them either. At least they had the excuse of eating to hide behind, but it wouldn't last forever. Naruto sighed. Should he apologize? It seemed like maybe he should, but at the moment, he was really having a hard time feeling bad about anything. It's not like this was a _real_ date; the day she agreed to an actual date with him was the day Sasuke professed his undying love for… anything.

Naruto watched her a moment as she picked distastefully at her ramen and caught himself gritting his teeth. It was like salt poured on a gaping wound. Really.

"Ya know, you could at least _pretend_ this isn't the worst thing you've ever had to do. It's not like I really want to be here either, but at least I'm tryin'," he growled and shoved another clump of noodles into his mouth.

Her head whipped around, and he couldn't help but feel a tiny bit of irritation lift at the familiar, outraged expression that greeted him. Until, of course, she opened her mouth.

"Could've fooled me. You're so uncomfortable you're practically twitching in your seat." With that, she turned back to her food and grumbled under her breath, "I wish we'd never made that stupid bet."

"Yeah, obviously," Naruto snorted in agreement. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sakura wince. It wasn't until he saw the _look_ Ayame-neesan was giving him from behind the counter, though, that he began to feel a little guilty. He wasn't entirely sure what she was trying to say with that look, but he knew disapproval when he saw it. Naruto sighed inwardly. Fine, make it _two_ kage bunshin kicking his ass later.

Shoveling more barely chewed noodles down his throat, he glanced at Sakura. "I wished we hadn't either," he admitted quietly. "Cause this sucks." She responded with a weak grin and a nod - which promptly turned into an eye roll when he loudly slurped up more noodles.

"Gyah, remind me to beat some manners into you one day."

Naruto laughed despite himself. "You and your sweet nothings."

"I'll sweet nothing my foot up your _ass_," she growled, half annoyed and half amused, and Naruto only laughed harder. Theirs was truly an interesting friendship to say the least.

* * *

"You did really good, ya know. I seriously thought it was Sasuke," he commented offhandedly as they slowly made their way toward her home. Things were finally beginning to feel somewhat normal between them, and with that the sort of lazy/comfortable feeling had returned to Naruto.

Sakura looked at him, the corner of her lips tugging upward slightly. "How'd you figure it out?"

"Just a feeling really. Even if he woke up one day and realized how sexy I am, it would take something like torture to get him to admit it," he laughed. From the smile on her face, Naruto assumed she agreed. "So... what made you think of _that_?" he ventured. The question had been burning in the back of his head since it happened, but he was no idiot. You didn't broach touchy subjects while she was pissed unless you wanted a beating.

"You guys made me think I'd fooled around with both of you _and_ Kakashi-sensei! That messes with your head. I just wanted you to know how it felt."

Silence.

"It's not like I expected him to go along with it," she mumbled a few moments later.

"But you expected him to _believe_ it," Naruto sighed.

She looked away, focusing on something across the street. Wow. He knew she had, but it was quite another thing for her to admit it.

He fell silent, not really knowing how to respond, and the fact that Sasuke had gone along with it… well, he still wasn't sure how he felt about that.

"I don't want to think about how long it'll be before he speaks to me again," moaned Sakura dejectedly. "How could I have been so _stupid_?"

Naruto sighed and turned his gaze upward, waiting for some sort of answer to fall out of the sky and smack him on the forehead. Sadly, it didn't.

"If it makes you feel any better, I doubt he'll wanna be even in the same room as me anytime soon," he finally said.

A high-pitched whine escaped Sakura's throat. "So is this it? Is this how teams break up?"

That was not an option Naruto had wanted to consider, but now that she mentioned it, Sasuke _could_ hold a grudge like no other.

"And if the genjutsu wasn't bad enough, I had to go and make it worse!"

Naruto began to nod his continued commiseration, but wait, that didn't make sense. "What do you mean?"

"Well, did you see his face after I grabbed your arm? It was just for a second, but he looked really pissed. It might be just because he expected me to be angry about going out with you." She gave him an apologetic look at that comment. "But I don't think that's it. I think he might've been a little… jealous."

Uh. "Jealous? Of us?" He wasn't usually one to doubt Sakura-chan, but that was just the weirdest thing he'd ever heard.

"Well, yeah. Not because he wants to be in your place, obviously, just … well, think about it. We've always been a three person team that's behaved a certain way around each other. But since we've regrouped, things have been different. You and I have been closer, and I've noticed that he's noticed, you know?"

Naruto raised an eyebrow as he tried to process all of that. "So you think he feels left out?"

"Maybe. I don't know," she snorted in exasperation. "Hell, for all I know, he could be jealous of me!" Sakura met his gaze and chuckled nervously.

Slowly, Naruto replied, "I don't think he's gay, Sakura-chan." When she only raised an eyebrow in response, he continued. "Seriously. I mean, he hides it well, so all you've seen is what just happened. I've been around him a lot more. I've seen him look when he thought no one was watching, and he was more than a little interested in the way you reacted to Kakashi-sensei in that jutsu."

He tried not to laugh at her shell-shocked expression.

"Then what was that earlier? He likes both?" The look on her face clearly showed that she'd never considered the possibility before.

"Could be." It was a much better conclusion than the alternative, he realized. The idea that he'd only gone along with it out of some stupid rival-humiliation thing made his stomach churn. "Would it bother you if he is?"

She looked at him thoughtfully for a moment before answering. "No, actually. It's just a surprise. I used to think stuff like that was the last thing on his mind, and now it turns out I might have twice the competition." Naruto glanced at her awkwardly and received a playful punch in the shoulder for his efforts. "That was a joke."

His responding chuckle was painfully forced.

"Does it bother you that he's at least somewhat attracted to you?" she asked a few moments later.

He considered it for a minute, and for once an answer came easily to him. If that was the case and Sasuke really _did _have the hots for him, things would be different for sure, but Naruto couldn't by any means say that it'd be upsetting. Grinning, he answered, "Nah. It would be kinda weird, but then it'd kinda make sense, too. Damn confusing, uptight bastard. Maybe I should go shag him rotten every now and then to loosen him up." He waggled his eyebrows at her then and ignored it when she rolled her eyes.

They'd walked almost an entire block before either of them ventured to break the silence again - Naruto realized rather belatedly that she must've been trying to work herself up it. "So, are you…?" Sakura made a nonsensical gesture with her hands, apparently unable to finish the question.

Naruto simply shrugged. "I never really thought about it. Didn't need to, ya know. There's never been a shortage of pretty girls," he replied, flashing her one of his winning smiles. "But if he tried to…" He trailed off, shrugging again. "I don't know. I mean, I guess I wouldn't know without trying it."

"You want to, don't you?" she asked quietly.

Well, that certainly wasn't a question he'd been expecting; Naruto immediately tripped over his own feet. "Wha?! What makes you think that?"

"You're stumbling all over yourself. Not that I blame you. If I knew for a fact Sasuke wanted me, I don't think I could keep from thinking about it either."

Hmm, well, he supposed she had a point there, but still. "And not me, Sakura-chan?" he asked teasingly.

"Pfft, I already know you're a walking ball of hormones," she waved him off, nose wrinkled.

Something in the dismissiveness of her response kicked him right in the gut, and he suddenly stepped in front of her, blocking her path. "Yeah, but what if you knew that right this moment I would gladly drag you behind that building and make you scream?" The intensity in his voice surprised even himself.

Sakura's eyes darted back and forth between his briefly, and she swallowed audibly before responding. "I'd say we'd better think about this carefully before we say something we can't take back. We have enough stuff to fix between all of us at the moment."

Naruto watched her intently for a moment, considering. Then his face broke out in a smile as he grabbed her hand and tugged her along. "Well, let's go then."

"W...where?"

"To get that uptight bastard and show him he's still a part of the team."

_TBC_


	7. No Losers Here

**A/N: **Thanks to beachlass, yiraheerai, and wildwesternwind for the beta! Epilogue soon to follow.

**Warnings: **teenage delinquency, stupid humor, and dealing with issues the maladjusted ninja way lol

**Disclaimer: **Naruto is the property of Masashi Kishimoto; I just like to play in his sandbox from time to time.

**The Sweetest Victory**

**Chapter 7: No Losers Here**

"Maybe you wouldn't be so damned uptight if you jerked off more. Hell, I'd do it _for_ you if I knew it would help."

Sasuke only raised an eyebrow in response – this was _Naruto_, after all. Stupid comments like that were inevitable.

"So would it?"

"_What?!_"

Slowly and emphasizing each word, Naruto asked, "Would it help?"

"I heard you the first time, Dead Last."

"And?"

Sasuke snorted and kept walking. "And you want to know if _you_ jerking me off will make me happy? I'm not even going to dignify that with an answer."

"Not happy, just… less irritable. Although, if I knew it would make you _happy_, I'd totally suck you off just to see how weird a smiling Sasuke looked." He grinned again, huge and stupid, eyes alight with that same devious sense of humor he'd always had even if it came out a little more raunchy now that he was older.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and smothered a chuckle. "You are so full of shit." As soon as he said it, though, the air around them changed, charged with a sudden predatory sense that made the hairs on his neck stand on end. A half second later, his back hit the building next to him.

"Am I?" Naruto made a grab for his shorts and amidst the confusion was _somehow_ able to get a hand down his pants and give his flaccid cock a squeeze.

That quickly broke Sasuke out of his stupor. "What the _hell_?"

"Come on, man. Let me do this for you." The mumbled words were hot against his neck as the hand between his legs squeezed. And when the blond pulled back just far enough to look him in the eye, his expression was imploring, not calculating.

Sasuke blinked, dumbfounded. 'He _really_ wants to do this.' Much to his horror, he felt himself respond a little to that conclusion. "I can do it just fine myself, you idiot." But he didn't push him off. Why the _fuck_ didn't he push him away and put an end to it?

"Yeah, but you won't. That's the problem." Naruto gave him a couple of quick strokes, and Sasuke quickly hardened in his teammate's hand.

Tipping his head back against the bricks with eyes scrunched shut, he surprised himself by groaning, "Just... make it quick."

The smell of burning food startled Sasuke's consciousness back to the present. He scowled and brought his fist down on the counter hard enough to rattle the lone bowl and spoon in the sink. The scene had been replaying over and over in his mind like a bad movie he just couldn't stop watching for the better part of the day. Never had he wanted to go back in time and kick his own ass so badly.

Forcing those thoughts from his mind, he transferred his food from the wok to a plate and carried it over to the small, two-person table.

With a near-contented sigh, Sasuke sat down, eagerly eying the hot, steamy spread before him. He'd definitely earned it. His morning had consisted of training _beyond_ exhaustion only to come home and clean his apartment to the point where one could eat off his bathroom floor.

If one were so inclined, that is. Only hapless buffoons like Naruto probably did shit like that, after all.

Immediately, he killed that train of thought – he wasn't particularly in the mood to lose his appetite again – picked up his chopsticks and snatched up a piece of sautéed eggplant. It was mere millimeters from his lips when a knock at the door made his blood run cold.

He didn't receive many visitors being the less than shining socialite he was. The majority of the villagers were only just now beginning to accept him after his quest for vengeance, but that didn't extend to friendly house calls. The few visitors he did receive were usually there for a specific purpose, Naruto and Sakura being the only ones who showed up just because they felt like it. Pushing himself out of his chair, he found himself hoping it was another one of Ibiki's surprise evaluations instead.

When opening the door revealed the two smiling faces of his teammates, though, Sasuke felt his stomach sink.

"What?"

With a smile, Naruto asked, "Ready to go?"

Not being in the habit of forgetting engagements, he blinked. "… Where?"

"Out. With us," Sakura supplied.

"No." He gave the door a good shove, but Naruto's hand stopped it just before it could slam in their creepy, cheerful faces.

"We're not asking you to come. We asked if you were ready. Sakura-chan's fully prepared to kick your ass if you don't cooperate." He glanced down at her, and she quickly nodded an affirmation.

Sasuke stared a few moments wondering what the hell it was they really wanted, how much of it was bluff, and whether or not it'd just be easier to commit seppuku right there.

Instead he huffed and, turning his back on them, left the door open as he walked back into the living room. He heard the two follow him inside and shut the door behind them. "I was about to eat." You are interrupting and unwelcome, his tone added.

Sakura glanced toward the table, her expression apologetic. Naruto didn't bother. He simply said, "We'll wait."

Sasuke bit back a curse and studied his teammate for a moment. The blond never broke eye contact and stood perfectly still, expression soft. It made Sasuke even more skeptical. If the idiot wasn't lying, then what was the catch? "Why?"

"Because," Naruto began with a grin. "It's no fun without our favorite prickly bastard."

Sasuke snorted. "I doubt that." He noticed his teammates share a quick look that he couldn't decipher.

"What? That you're fun? Yeah, you got a point. Sometimes you're a real pain in the ass." Naruto's grin faltered a moment, his expression turned sheepish. "Well, you know what I mean," he chuckled awkwardly.

Staring blankly, Sasuke ran Naruto's words through his head. It took a moment before he caught on and sneered in disgust. "Hilarious. I'm going to eat now. Let yourself out."

Stubborn as ever, though, Naruto didn't appear to leaving any time soon. "Look, man. No one cares if you're gay, bi, _whatever_. I always thought Sakura-chan and Ino's feelings were a little too deep to be friendly if ya know what I mean." He waggled his eyebrows a couple of times but quickly stopped at the warning growl and knuckle crack from Sakura.

"I don't need your reassurances, Dead Last." Physically tossing the moron out the door was looking better by the minute.

"Yeah, yeah. I know. You're Mr. Fucking Cool 'n all that. All I'm saying is that it doesn't change anything, alright? I still wanna kick your ass, and she still wants in your pants."

Sakura didn't hold back that time and brought her fist down on the top of his head _hard_.

Sasuke didn't bother hiding his smirk; the moron deserved that one.

"Damn it, Sakura-chan! Is this how you treat all of your dates?"

"Not helping," she growled then sent another apologetic expression Sasuke's direction.

Naruto pouted a moment, rubbing the quickly forming bump before going back to his previous argument. "_Anyway_, we're cool now, right?" he asked as he began shooing Sasuke toward the kitchen. "You can go eat your shit real quick, then we can leave."

Avoiding the unwelcome invasion to his personal space, Sasuke resisted the urge to punch some sense right up his dense teammate's nose. "No, everything's _not_ cool now. You know what happened, don't you?"

"More or less," he shrugged. His expression then turned downright demented. "Wanna know what happened in mine? It was some freaky shit!"

Sasuke blanched.

"Nah, man. I'm just fuckin' with ya. I mean, it was still kinda gay 'n all, so we're basically even, but it doesn't matter."

He blinked and stared at his teammate. "It doesn't matter," he echoed indignantly then turned to Sakura, his tone a little more insistent. "It doesn't _matter_?"

She shook her head and repeated, "It doesn't matter."

They were insane; there was no other explanation. "Bullshit. It fucking matters to _me, _so don't sit there and act like this doesn't upset you!"

There! He felt a tiny sliver of his dignity return when her eyes burned with something other than that stupid hopeful look they'd had since they got there.

A few seconds later, though, her anger seemed to turn to resignation. "I don't want to fight with you, Sasuke. I accepted that you weren't interested in me some time ago, so don't expect me to sit here and sob about it. I don't care if you're gay."

"But." He tried to interrupt, but she forged on even louder.

"_I'm not done yet._ I don't care if Naruto was just convenient. I don't care if you're confused or curious or _whatever_ reason you probably won't give me; it _doesn't matter_. I just want my teammates back."

He watched her a moment before glancing over at Naruto. He grinned and seemed to agree with her, apparently hellbent on pretending nothing had happened. Stupid, stubborn idiots, both of them.

With a sigh, he replied with the only thing he could think to say at that point.

"It's not _shit_." It was hard not to laugh at Naruto's look of utter confusion. "My food," he clarified.

Naruto snickered. "Yeah, okay, man. Go eat your damn high-class, delectable _shit_ so we can go already."

"...I really hate you sometimes."

"Yeah, I know."

Naruto had waved him off, so he glanced back at Sakura. She seemed more relaxed now and only smiled from in front of the sofa.

Sasuke shook his head as he sat down and picked up his chopsticks once again. Just as expected, his food was cold, but it didn't hurt his appetite any, he found. Across the room, he could hear his teammates discussing where to go. As usual, they couldn't come to an agreement. Alright, he decided. He'd go along with their little charade; he only wondered how long it would last.

* * *

Ten minutes later found Sasuke wandering aimlessly around Konoha's business district with his teammates. The sun had set, leaving only orange and purple streaked remnants in the sky. Street lights were beginning to flicker on, but most of the light was coming from the windows of the stores and establishments that lined the street.

"Where are we going?" he asked after Naruto peeked inside the third building – this one a bowling alley – before frowning and continuing to the next.

"Haven't decided yet."

"Obviously." It was going to be a long night, he could already tell. The number of pedestrians was increasing. It wouldn't be long before they'd be able to hear music coming from the pub.

"Why? You got somewhere else to be?" Naruto grinned.

"Home would be nice."

That earned him a pinch on the arm from Sakura. He scowled and suddenly missed the days when she used to defend _him_ from their teammate.

"What's the point of dragging me out if you don't even know where we're going?" It was just like every other time the three of them had gone out together. As was Naruto's reply.

"It beats starin' at the same four walls, doesn't it?"

Sasuke snorted. "I'm not too sure actually."

A sly smile spread across his teammate's face as he seemingly flippantly suggested, "We could check out that karaoke place we just passed."

Sasuke's face fell. Yes, this was as annoyingly normal as they got. "There's not enough liquor in the village."

Sakura giggled. "Oh, I don't know. Everyone has a price, right?"

'... the _hell_?' Sasuke stared a moment, unsure what to make of the quick quirk of the eyebrows that had accompanied that comment.

He seemed to be the only one who noticed, though, as one glance at Naruto proved the blond was too consumed with _whatever_ it was his convoluted mind was thinking about as he rubbed his chin and glanced down the street. Suddenly, he turned back toward them grinning so wide it looked as if his face might crack. "Okay, okay. If you're just gonna bitch the whole time... Wait here a sec." He ducked into the nearby corner store before either could object.

Sasuke tried to ignore the slight sense of dread settled deep in his gut. He glanced at Sakura for some sort of explanation, but she only shrugged. Why he put up with this shit was beyond him.

A few minutes later, Naruto exited the store with a paper bag tucked under one arm. He couldn't tell what all was in there, but Sasuke could easily see the package of toilet paper sticking out of top.

Naruto didn't even acknowledge their inquiring looks and instead launched into a question of sorts that lacked pretty much all the details. "You've got three choices: Kakashi's apartment, the old hag's office, or Kiba's place." Sasuke didn't miss "the shit" mumbled along with that last choice.

There was a distinct moment of silence, then Naruto sighed."Never mind. I'll pick. This'll be fun, trust me." The blond smiled, genuinely this time.

Sasuke's previously tickling sense of dread suddenly became heavy as a lead weight.

* * *

The view from the roof wasn't bad. It was a taller building in one of the older districts of the village that had once been primarily residential. As time had passed, though, businesses had slowly started springing up throughout the area and with them, bolder paint choices, more street lights, and more people. It was interesting to look at if not altogether aesthetically pleasing. Leaning a little to look down over the edge, Sasuke watched a young couple walk past on the sidewalk several stories below him and thought about how, a few years ago, Naruto would've found the situation a prime opportunity for a well-placed water balloon or stink bomb. Things may have changed but only marginally, he decided as he turned his attention back to him teammates a few feet away.

"You can't be serious." Sakura shook her head in disbelief at the package in her hands.

"Sure I can." Naruto sat, feet splayed in front of him as he continued to rummage through the paper bag before tossing another box without looking. "Trade with him if you want."

Sasuke easily caught the scented pink box and damn near dropped it upon reading the label. "What the _hell_ are we going to do with these?"

"They're for you," he snickered. "Unless you've decided to quit being a pussy already and help us."

He was going to _kill_ him!

Surprisingly, Sakura took it upon herself before he even had a chance.

"Idiot!" she shrieked while whopping their annoying teammate over the head with her fist. "I never agreed to this."

"Aww, come on!" Naruto whined. His bag of supplies had spilled around his feet, and he was rubbing the top of his head where a second lump was beginning to form. Sucking it up, he flashed her another grin. "You know you wanna." His expression only served to add to the innuendo.

She started to yell something back but stopped mid-breath as if suddenly unsure of what to say. Instead she frowned a moment before continuing. "There aren't even _words_ for how stupid and ridiculous this is."

"Which is exactly why the two of you are going to do it!"

"...I'm not listening to this." Sasuke turned to leave. Naturally, he wasn't two steps away before Naruto was scrambling to stop him.

"Wait. Five minutes. That's all I ask, then you can go home and forget all about it. Both of you," he added, glancing over at Sakura.

Sasuke tried not to think about the way the blond continued to press his hand against his chest as he spoke, as if touching him wasn't even the tiniest bit awkward after last night.

Sakura's eyebrows were drawn and lips pursed instead of the usual screaming tirade and threats of physical violence. She was already caving, Sasuke could tell. And unfortunately, so could Naruto, because the loud-mouth then turned all his attention on him.

"Please? I won't ask anything of you ever again."

Sasuke grit his teeth. "That's a damn lie, and you know it!"

"I'll try my very best for like a whole _month_ even!"

He was fairly certain Naruto's eyes had actually sparkled just then. Beside him, Sakura was giving him a look he recognized as let's-just-get-this-over-with-already-before-he-starts-_actually_-begging-because-you-_know_-he-will. Sasuke sighed. "Five minutes. Then I'm going home."

He was fairly certain he'd have nightmares of the victory dance that followed for years to come.

* * *

Naruto sighed contentedly again as he pulled a hand up to rest behind his head. He'd flopped down on the grass grinning ear-to-ear as soon as they'd entered the park at full sprint. Sakura had at least made sure it was clean before joining the idiot and patting the spot between them in invitation. "That was _awesome_." His stupid smile had yet to leave.

Sasuke snorted. "It wasn't that great." He sat, leaning back on his hands, legs stretched out in front of him as he stared up at the clear night sky. Admittedly, he was the most relaxed he'd felt all evening.

"Oh, shut up. You liked it."

He felt Naruto nudge his calf and didn't resist the urge to kick him. Just because the moron was right, didn't mean he had to know it.

"Ow! See if I show _you_ a good time again. Next time it'll just be me an' Sakura-chan, since you wanna be such a prick."

"That a promise?" Upon seeing Naruto's response, Sasuke made a mental note to, next chance he got, shove that god damned finger up the idiot's... Uh, maybe he should just break it instead.

Next to them, Sakura cleared her throat.

"Oh no!" the blond argued. "Don't _even_ try to deny it. I was watching. You had more fun than _I_ did!"

The irony was that, as far as Sasuke could tell, it was true.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sakura blow her bangs out of her face before rolling onto her side. With a sigh, she propped herself up on her elbow and leveled them with a look. Something about the gesture struck him as so much more mature than she had the right to be, considering current circumstances and all.

"Just because it wasn't the _worst_ thing I've ever let you talk me into, doesn't mean it's something we'll be doing regularly." She was trying to keep a stern face, he could tell, but the slight curve of her lip gave her away.

Naruto, on the other hand, was a different story. "Liar." He was still flat on his back looking thoroughly satiated. Until he scrunched his eyes and scraped his tongue against his teeth again.

Sakura laughed. "Is that _still_ bothering you? I thought 'bad ass shinobi' weren't bothered by little things like bad tastes."

His reply was decidedly whiny and accusatory. "You didn't try it."

"I was busy with other things," she argued. "Besides, did you really have to put it in your _mouth_?"

"I thought we decided we were gonna blow..."

She cut him off. "No, _you_ decided that. I said it would have the same effect either way."

Naruto sat up then, his expression horribly patronizing. "Look, sometimes you just need to trust me, okay? I mean, you're a girl. How could you understand?"

Sasuke mentally groaned. They had to know how this sounded, right?

"I _see_," she glowered. "I wouldn't understand, and yet, _you're_ the one still complaining about the taste of condom in your mouth."

Naruto's cheeks puffed up in brilliant display of poutiness, but he thankfully dropped the issue, instead turning his focus on their team leader. "Kakashi-sensei loves us too much to kill us, don'tcha think?" The idiot looked oddly amused by the fact.

"He hasn't killed us yet; I don't know why he'd start now," Sakura offered.

"It's probably safe to say our mission pay will be docked for a while, though."

Beside him, Sakura groaned. "_Why_ do I let you talk me into these things, Naruto?"

"Because you love me?"

She threw a rock at his head and nailed him right between the eyes.

"Oh, _sure_. Perverted genjutsu are fine, but drag you into a little harmless vandalism and you get violent on me."

"I wasn't any more okay with those genjutsu than you were." She quickly shifted a guilt-ridden gaze his direction before glaring once again at Naruto.

Sasuke closed his eyes momentarily. And now they were back to this. Were they _trying_ to make him miserable? "I don't think a few... _pads_ and inflated condoms stuck to his windows really count as vandalism."

Naruto cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah, it does actually. At least The Third always thought so."

He _would_ know, Sasuke brooded.

Sakura's mumbled "oh god" sounded utterly horrified, and peering at them with her hands over her mouth, she moaned, "How many rolls of toilet paper did we use?"

"Hey! No panic attacks!" Naruto ordered. "We're having fun, remember?"

"Are we?" she demanded, glaring hard enough to make even the most seasoned shinobi second guess any plans to cross her.

Naruto was oblivious as usual. That or he was trying to piss her off. It was hard to tell sometimes. "Well, it's no wild romp on the Hokage monument, but yeah, it's fun."

Sakura threw another rock at him; Sasuke was tempted to throw one as well. They'd had a dozen conversations like this one – ones that he'd even participated in! – but too much was too much.

"Naruto, if you're comparing a 'wild romp' to TP'ing Sensei's apartment – something I haven't done since I was 13 by the way – I think Jiraiya scarred you much, much more than you originally let on." She threw a wink Sasuke's direction and sat back looking very pleased with herself.

With a deep, calming breath, Sasuke closed his eyes and tried to ignore the fact that for once vulgar, loud-mouthed Naruto was at a loss for words. It was bad enough Sakura was joking about sex again. It wasn't something she was prone to doing, usually reserved for putting Naruto's assumptions in their rightful place. And usually, even he was able to find it amusing. But _sometimes_, sometimes, there was a flirtatious edge to her indignant criticism. It was... weird.

It didn't take long for Naruto to recover, luckily or unluckily as that may be. He chuckled then said, "Well, I wouldn't call myself scarred, _but_." He glanced over at them, index finger pointing at nothing in particular but pointing nonetheless. "I won't lie and say there aren't some things I'd wish I'd never seen." He made a face then. "Did I ever tell you 'bout that time I walked in on Ero-sennin, a prostitute, and the biggest bowl of phallic-shaped fruit ever?"

"No," Sakura answered quickly, eyes wide in alarm. "And please, for the sake of my stomach, _don't_."

Naruto looked a little disgruntled at that but thankfully kept the details of Jiraiya's conquest to himself. "_Although_," he added, much to Sasuke's horror. "I guess I can sorta see the attraction. I mean, if I were to walk in on you and a banana, I'd prolly be down for that."

The fact that he looked utterly depraved was only made worse by the fact that Sasuke wasn't sure which of them he'd said it to. Maybe even both of them, he decided, watching Naruto grin like a lecher as he glanced back and forth between them. Ugh.

"Can you go even five minutes without talking about sex?" Before he even had time to process the thought, he was on his feet, the words already out his mouth. Sasuke grit his teeth and turned away from them. So much for going along with their little charade.

"But I always talk like this." There was nothing but confusion in his tone.

Sasuke resisted the urge to kick something in frustration. "I _know_!"

"Er, so?"

"So? _So?!_ So maybe sometimes I just want to be with my friends without the mental images of wild romps on mountains or sweaty threesomes after training or wondering if that joke really was a joke after all or what that look was supposed to mean. And... _bananas_? Seriously, what the _hell_?" His head began to pound, and the urge to hit something was unbearable. He was mad, mad at the bet, mad at them for acting like everything was perfectly normal, mad at himself for just not _getting_ it. But mostly, he was mad at himself for blurting it all out just then. Once it started coming, though, it didn't seem to be able to stop. "_Damn it!!_" He kicked the ground hard enough to send a cloud of dust toward the tree line.

Behind him, his teammates were silent. Sasuke took a deep breath and turned to face them. Sakura was biting her lip again, and Naruto had the good sense to look a little embarrassed. Then his teammates were exchanging yet another look – those _had_ to mean something. In his mind's eye, he could still feel Naruto pressed up against him and the pangs of arousal that shot through him when the moron had breathlessly begged, _Come on, man. Let me do this for you._

Sasuke shook his head in defeat. "This isn't going to work."

Naruto started to protest but was unable to get any further than "But."

_Just... make it quick._

He had to look away. "We can't just pretend like every thing's fine and it actually _be_ that way. Some things you can't take back."

"Who says I want to take anything back?"

"You have no idea what I mean, do you?"

Naruto was instantly on his feet and in Sasuke's face. "Oh, fuck you. I know exactly what you're saying. Look, man, what's done is done. You're the only one being an obsessive asshole. As usual." By the time he was done, the anger had already drained out of him.

"Am I?" Beside them, Sakura looked like she wanted to say something, but when it didn't happen a second later, Sasuke turned to leave.

"Wait." Sakura grabbed his shoulder, and it took everything in his power not to jerk out of her grasp.

"What?" The weariness in his voice surprised even himself.

"You two have to walk me home."

Sasuke snorted. "I think Dead Last can handle that much at least."

"No, it has to be both of you," she insisted, this time with a lot more conviction.

"Why?"

"Because. We're all out _together_, and it's customary for the boys to walk the girls home." He started to pull away, but her grip on his shirt tightened, fingers twisting into the fabric. "Please, Sasuke."

He eyed her skeptically a moment, but the exhaustion settling in his bones was all the convincing he needed. Anything to be done with the both of them, really. "Fine," he sighed and turned toward her home the second Sakura released him. They quickly caught up.

The trio only made it a block before she suddenly hooked her arm in Sasuke's. He froze at the contact and quickly twisted his arm around in hope of dislodging it. But Sakura was having none of that. He got the feeling that she could be dead and would still be latched onto his arm just as tightly as she was then with the same seemingly innocent smile. "What are you doing?" he demanded.

"Being walked home," she answered simply and offered her other arm to Naruto who nodded cheerfully and took it. Obviously, they were in on it together, he thought. Or at the very least, Dumb Ass approved.

"Uh huh." This was about as innocent as the time Orochimaru invited him to his private onsen under the pretense of 'relaxation,' but this was different in that he couldn't quite figure out their motives. They weren't out to humiliate him – he was _fairly_ certain anyway. They seemed genuinely concerned with keeping their team together, so how did this fit in the picture?

He didn't have to wait long for an answer, since a few minutes later found them on Sakura's front lawn. She quickly disentangled and turned to face them. He was fairly certain the breast brushing against his arm as she did so had been no accident. He tried not to dwell on that.

"I had fun," she began.

Sasuke kept his doubts to himself; she'd just deny it anyway.

"Next time will be better." It was silent for a second while she chewed the inside of her cheek. But then she stepped forward with speed she rarely displayed outside of work, and...

Sasuke stiffened when her lips touched his cheek, but just as quickly, they were gone.

"Wha?"

Immediately, her finger went to his lips, silencing him. "Don't. Not now, okay? Just... let me try."

Once again, memory of Naruto's words frolicked through his thoughts._ Let me do this for you._

His eyes searched hers, but all he found was a mirror of himself it seemed. Awkward and confused, but hopeful. A moment later, the finger fell, and Sasuke watched wide-eyed as Sakura then kissed Naruto on the cheek. The blond was grinning widely – the idiot probably couldn't help it – but even he wore an expression of bewilderment as if he, too, realized what an interesting predicament they were all in.

This was…. To be honest, Sasuke had no words for what he thought about this. Would anything _ever_ be normal between the three of them? Was it even possible? It definitely hadn't started out normal, and if they proceed with ...this, life was certain to only get more bizarre.

Sakura smiled at both of them, her cheeks almost as red as her shirt, before turning to climb the steps of her porch. "'Night guys. See you in the morning," she called with one last glance over her shoulder upon reaching the door. Without looking, he knew Naruto was watching her as well, and Sasuke grinned despite himself.

What did he know of normal anyway? That was something _other_ people experienced, ordinary people, not Uchihas and certainly not Uchihas who defect in order to kill the older brother who wiped out their clan. No, Sasuke could admit to himself he didn't have the first clue about being normal.

The door clicked shut, and Sasuke glanced at his other teammate. The doofus was still grinning sheepishly at the house. It was a long couple of seconds before he finally turned toward Sasuke.

"I'm _not_ walking you home."

Naruto chuckled a moment before he seemed to catch on. "Oi! I'm not walking you home either." His retort lacked any real venom to it, though.

They fell in step as they started back the way they came. "You're both fucking nuts. You know that, right?" The fact that he thought he was equally crazy for even entertaining the idea he kept to himself.

Naruto chuckled and folded his arms behind his head. "Yeah, well, what's new?"

Sasuke shook his head and continued the rest of the trip in silence. Normal was overrated anyway.


	8. Epilogue

**A/N:** I want to thank everyone for their encouragement and sticking with me for the long haul. It was NOT supposed to take this long. Oi! But here it is. And most of all, thanks for reading. Hope you enjoy it. Short and to the point Epilogue is short and to the point. Plotless and smutty sequel has been in the works almost as long as this thing has.

**Pairing:** NaruSakuSasu. Yes.

**Disclaimer:** Naruto isn't mine. Ya'll know this by now, right?

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**The Sweetest Victory**

**Epilogue**

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"He's late," Naruto observed, impatiently dropping his pack to the ground with a thud.

Sakura smiled. They'd only been waiting an hour so far. "And this surprises you?"

"'Course not," he replied as he worked a kink out of his shoulder and leaned lazily against the village wall. "We probably have enough time for a quickie _and_ go get some breakfast before he drags his sorry ass over here."

Sasuke sat a few feet away on a bench, his elbow resting on the bag sitting next him. He rolled his eyes but remained silent, a reaction Inner Sakura didn't agree with.

Smothering her violent fantasies about sticks connecting with the side Naruto's head, Sakura instead cleared her throat. "He'll be here soon enough, then you can torture him to your heart's content."

The blond's expression turned dark. "He deserves to be tortured after making us take nothing but D-rank missions for a month! I was lucky my water wasn't cut off." He crossed his arms stubbornly over his chest and glared at the ground.

"Well, you didn't expect him to believe that enemy ninja infiltrated the village just to vandalize his apartment, did you?" If he said yes, joking or not, she was going to hit him.

"Psh, cleaning it up should've been enough."

Sakura didn't reply, just stared at him in disbelief. They'd had this conversation several times already. Her opinion on the matter wasn't going to change.

"Oh, forget it." Naruto waved dismissively. When he was done sulking a few minutes later he glanced back at her with a grin and waggling eyebrows. "I'd rather torture you anyway."

Sakura cracked her knuckles and narrowed her eyes. "Behave." It was early, but not so early she wouldn't smack some sense into him if the need arose.

An amused sort of snort coming from Sasuke then stole her attention. It figured he'd wait until _then_ to join the conversation. "Sometimes, you're just as bad," she sighed.

"No way! It took _years_ to get this annoying." Naruto looked completely affronted, and Sakura couldn't help but laugh.

"Don't worry," Sasuke replied with the most insincere of grins. "No one could ever take your title. You were _born_ annoying."

The blond stuck his tongue out and mumbled something that sounded disturbingly like "annoy you _all_ night."

Sakura laughed again and glanced over at Sasuke. He met her gaze and shook his head slightly in what she interpreted as silent, resigned humor.

She turned her attention to Naruto then.

"Think I won't?" he mouthed silently.

There was no doubt in her mind he'd try. She made a thoughtful face. "Well..."

"_Don't_ encourage him," Sasuke warned.

"Hey!" Naruto protested while Sakura giggled.

"Who do we not want to encourage?" Kakashi had appeared unexpectedly once again, within punching distance and false smile in place. Sakura hated it when he did that; she was certain it was only to annoy them.

Not that anyone would've answered him anyway – it was rhetorical, of course – but Naruto's accusatory "You're late!" effectively changed the subject all the same.

It was for only a second, but there was something odd about the way their team leader looked at them. It made Sakura wonder – and not for the first time – if, in fact, he _did_ have some idea of what they'd been talking about. Or maybe just a suspicion. Or maybe she was just paranoid. That was always a possibility.

Kakashi shook his head slightly and with a tired sigh, he pulled his book out and began walking through the gate. "Wouldn't want to be late for our assignment."

Sasuke followed, then Sakura. Behind her, she heard Naruto grumbling that it'd be _his_ fault if they were late anyway. Sakura smiled despite herself. The sun was warm on her skin, and the breeze rustled the nearby treetops. She watched as a leaf detached itself from its branch and took flight, weaving and dipping and dancing with the air before finally becoming nothing more than a spec above them.

It had been two months since the bet, and sometimes it seemed as if nothing had changed. They still bickered over whose fault it was every time they found themselves running laps around the village or picking up nin-dog waste or whatever creative punishments they were given. They still teased each other mercilessly over any embarrassing moments between them. They still hung out together on their days off. Occasionally, they even still plotted over a bottle of sake ways to get Kakashi's mask off – which more often than not, resulted in Sakura punching the crap out of Naruto for his suggestions.

They still annoyed their team leader – intentionally or otherwise – every time they were together to the point of worrying Kakashi-sensei might really make good on his threats to replace them. Naruto still flirted, Sasuke still brooded, and Sakura still threatened both with physical violence regularly as Kakashi ignored them all in favor of his beloved books.

Naruto fell into step with Sakura, thumbs hooked under the shoulder straps of his bag and eyeing her suspiciously. "What are you so happy about?"

"Just thinking," she offered, smiling even wider. It was fun to tease him; sadly, he wasn't taking the bait this time.

Naruto nodded knowingly. "I see. You were totally checking out sensei's ass again, weren't you?"

It was okay, though, because she wasn't taking the bait either. "Nope. I was ogling Sasuke's actually."

Naruto pretended to be wounded a second, then sprinted a few feet ahead to walk with Sasuke. When he looked back at her with the cheekiest grin ever, all Sakura could do was laugh.

Okay, so not _everything_ was the same as it had been. As it turned out, Naruto _could_ act like a ninja when he wanted to – who knew? – so what had changed was barely perceivable to anyone but themselves. It was subtle, discreet – _laughable_ considering this was team seven after all who were usually as subtle as a brick to the head. Which was why everyone was shocked when two months later, rumors began circulating Konoha about how the three had been caught in the throes of something rather naughty and taboo.

But _that _was another story.

The End.


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